


Life's Just a Game Until the Game Stops Bein' Fun

by jennieisacookie



Series: Providence [1]
Category: Good Omens (TV), Good Omens - Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett
Genre: Blizzards & Snowstorms, Body Horror, But for some reason, Crowley Was Raphael Before He Fell (Good Omens), Crowley is sweet on humans, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Gabriel just wants a nice time, God punishes Gabriel, Gore, Guitar, Human Gabriel (Good Omens), Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Blood, Nightmares, Not a Mary Sue, OC is human, Panic Attacks, Pete the Snake, Self-Doubt, Shopping Fluff, Sick Gabriel, Sleepovers, They/Them Pronouns for Beelzebub (Good Omens), Torture, Vulnerable Gabriel (Good Omens), actually God knows, add more tags as it goes on, also i have a tendency to be mean to him, also i know that there are colors that exist in heaven, and Aziraphale - Freeform, but a pomegranate, but i haven't gotten that far yet, but i put it to use, eventually, gabe gets nerfed, having wings sawn off, he learns how to human, i mean VERY self indulgent, i remember that the forbidden fruit, i will be nice tho, night time visit, oh and i was raised lutheran, oh and the Husbands have a pet snake, okay so i may be indulging myself with the guitar, or any of that kinda stuff, so i dont really know the books, so i have a lot of weird theology knowledge, so i might use that later, so my mom was raised catholic, so who knows, supposedly wasn't an apple, that dont on earth, that i can't really back up, the plan is to give gabriel a puppy, vERY SELF INDULGENT FLUFF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-28
Updated: 2020-02-24
Packaged: 2020-09-28 12:55:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 26,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20426327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jennieisacookie/pseuds/jennieisacookie
Summary: God isn't pleased with Gabriel, her messenger. It might have something to do with Gabriel threatening Aziraphale unnecessarily and being quite ignorant to Her creations. Either way, Gabe finds himself to be completely powerless, wingless, and stranded on the streets of Soho. Oh, and it's snowing. Gabriel knows he can't survive on his own on Earth, so he goes to the one place he knows.Aziraphale answers the knocking on the bookshop door, despite it being well after normal store hours, let alone his own. He sees his own boss shivering on the steps and immediately decides to take him in. He learns what being human is like from Aziraphale, Crowley, and even a little bit from their pet snake, Pete.It's rough at first, but eventually he manages to find a purpose.NOTE: I changed my username, but I am still the original authorTHIS FIC IS DISCONTINUED TO REWRITE THE ENTIRE THING, PLEASE BE PATIENT WITH ME. I WILL POST THE NEW FIC AS A SECOND PART IN THIS SERIES, BUT IT WILL STAND ALONE





	1. Chapter 1: Awakening

When Gabriel opened his eyes, he was confused. First reason being, he didn’t remember closing his eyes to begin with. Being an angel and all didn’t require blinking, so he never made it a habit. He was contemplating how he ended up closing his eyes when he noticed the bigger problem. He was cold. Truly cold, down to his core. There was no heavenly light inside him to warm his soul.

That’s when he remembered his very one-sided ‘talk’ with God.  _ Metatron appeared before him while he was going through paperwork. “Gabriel, the Almighty is not pleased with your actions.” _

_ Gabe was taken aback. Were they not justified? Had Aziraphale not outright committed treason for stopping the Apocalypse? _

_ “And so, the Almighty has decided that you are to live life on Earth as a human. She hopes that you can learn what Aziraphale was protecting.” _

_ Mouth agape, he struggled for words. “But… I was just following orders!” _

_ Metatron cut in. “Your orders are to love all of God’s creations. Your actions towards Aziraphale had proven your failure to answer to God’s wishes. After you live a mortal life and have proven worthy, you may return” _

He shivered and took stock of his surroundings. He noticed he was just a few blocks away from where Aziraphale had decided to set up his shop. Gabe had a difficult decision to make. He could either stay cold on the streets, and not have a place to stay, or he could suck up his pride and ask for help. 

Memories of his ‘visits’ with Aziraphale flashed before his eyes. Memories of his flat above his bookshop, of the couches and a warm fireplace. He knew what he was going to do before he had finished his thought. So he found himself working his way down the crowded and cold sidewalk to the bookshop. 

Snow was falling, he realized as a snowflake hit him in the eyeball. It was really cold. He regretted wearing only suits, because this one was failing in keeping in his body heat. His short hair didn’t help him much either. Humans really are odd mammals, aren’t they? They have such fine body hair, it’s almost useless to even have it. They manufacture clothes to keep in heat and to protect their pride, but the clothes often aren’t enough.

Wait. When he would go for runs to check in on the angels, he remembered getting warmer. Maybe if he ran, he’d warm up? It was worth a try. After all, it’s not like he’d die from it, right?

It was getting darker when he landed on the steps outside of the bookshop. He had only slipped and fallen three times on the way. The ‘closed’ sign on the door had made him reconsider asking Aziraphale for help. However, the setting sun, falling snow, and increased shivering had spoken louder than his first thoughts.

Gabe knocked violently on the door. He paced in the doorway, trying to warm up even more. It took all of his strength to not curl up by the door where the inside heat was escaping. He knocked even harder this next time, not even a minute later.

The door opened just a few seconds after his second round of knocking. “I’m afraid we are very much closed…” Aziraphale trailed off once he realized who was at the door. “Gabriel? What are you doing here?”

“C-can I come in?” He heard his teeth clatter together. As a response, Aziraphale stepped aside, and motioned him inside. The door locked behind the pair and Gabriel tried to find the hottest place in the building. He found it, in the form of a couch in front of a fireplace, blankets piled on with a mug that appeared to be filled with cocoa on the floor. He made himself comfortable there, cocooning himself in the still-warm blankets.

For a few minutes, he just kept his eyes closed and let the feeling return in his toes. The blankets were soft and worn. Obviously loved for however many centuries Aziraphale owned them. It was even nicer, however, to feel Aziraphale’s presence in the building. Though, of course, he couldn’t feel it as strongly as he used to. But it was nice to know that there was still some bit of Heaven he could cling onto.

He knew Aziraphale would help him. It’s a part of who he was. Gabe knew that the millennia spent on Earth had given Aziraphale a stronger sense of compassion than he could ever hope to understand.

Once he could feel his fingers again, he let his eyes open. Aziraphale was seated across from him, back to the fireplace. He was sipping on his own mug of cocoa, with another sitting a few feet in front of him, clearly intended for Gabe.

“What happened?” Aziraphale asked, quieter this time. He lowered his cup of cocoa into his lap, and reached to give Gabe his own.

Gabriel grimaced at the memory. “The Almighty isn’t pleased with my actions,” he started. “And so as punishment, I am to live as a human. Mortal as can be.” He raised his cocoa to his mouth and began to pour some in. However, he had to spit it out into the mug. He let his tongue stick out a bit as he talked around it. “Ithhsss hot”

Aziraphale smiled, cheeky bastard. “It’s hot cocoa, it’s in the name. Here, I’ll cool yours down for you.” he waved his hand in Gabe’s vague direction. Sure enough, this time the cocoa was cool enough to hold in his mouth. He was surprised when he knew how to swallow. In his millennia of existence, never once had he taken a drink of anything. But here he was, swallowing down this cocoa out of instinct.

“What are you going to do then?” Aziraphale asked, forgetting about the cocoa and not even letting Gabe express his thoughts on the drink.

“I was hoping… well I was hoping that I could stay with you?” with sheepish eyes, he looked into Aziraphale’s eyes. Az seemed to have a battle inside himself. And for good reason too. It was Gabriel who tried to burn him in hellfire, after all. 

Wind blew viciously as a storm began to brew outside. It was almost completely dark out now, and Gabe could only see the streetlights, and quickly falling snow. When he turned back to Aziraphale, he discovered that he was looking in the same direction as Gabe was moments ago. He then sighed.

“Well it would be completely rude of me to not give you help when you ask for it.” Aziraphale was now lightly tapping on his own mug.

Gabriel felt some kind of weight in his chest lift. He was unaware that it was even there, but was nevertheless happy to see it go. “Thank you.” He said quietly, pulling the blankets closer to him with his free hand.

Gabe was suddenly very aware of everything going on in his body. His heart beat wildly in his chest and his eyes were getting… uncomfortable. That was the only way he could describe the feeling. Blinking was slow and much more purposeful. His chest rose and fell with the breaths he was taking. He wasn’t even aware he was doing it until now.

He looked down into his mug, feeling a sudden awkwardness in the room. All of these new experiences and feelings were weighing down in his mind. There was so many memories from over the millennia, how could he ever remember everything?

“Right, so I suppose I’ll get the bed ready for you,” Aziraphale broke the silence and stood. 

It hadn’t even occurred to Gabriel that he’d need to sleep. Was that what was making his eyes feel weird? They were heavy and stayed shut for longer than he cared when he blinked. Aziraphale left the room and he could hear footsteps going upstairs.

He just stared at the fire and lost himself in his thoughts. Not even he was sure what those thoughts were himself. He just lost himself in the moving flame and the warmth of the blankets he wrapped himself with.

The Almighty had a plan. There was no questioning Her choices and orders. Gabe was grateful that he ended up as close to Aziraphale as he did. Maybe that was not a coincidence on Her end. There was no such thing, he learned in his years of working.

“I’ve cleaned up the bedroom, and managed a change of pajamas for you to sleep in. I can see you’re tired and we can discuss more in the morning,” Aziraphale was suddenly right next to him. Gabe wasn’t sure when that happened. He nodded and stood from his perch on the couch.

He didn't care that he looked absolutely ridiculous when he pulled the warm blanket over his head and wrapped around his body. If Aziraphale thought he looked funny, he didn't say anything. 

He didn't realize how weary he felt until he was in the bedroom alone. Aziraphale had given him a look he couldn't quite interpret and shut the door behind him, leaving Gabriel to his own devices. For a while he just stood though, basking in the leftover heat from the fire stored in the thick blanket. Eventually he turned his attention to the pajamas folded nicely on top of the bed. The blanket was thrown on the bed, and he hoped that in the short time it would take him to undress and redress it wouldn't lose any of its heat.

He was aware of Aziraphale talking in the other room. He probably called that demon friend of his on the 'telephone' or whatever he called it. He couldn't bring himself to care as he struggled with the belt on his dress pants. Demons were scum, just fallen angels whom he could smite easily…

Not anymore. He stilled when he came to the realization that he was as vulnerable to temptation as any other mortal walking the streets. He also realized that he was getting nowhere with the belt that refused to come off. He’d had little practice with using his fingers for dexterous things, other than typing out reports. 

Hot liquid was coming from his eyes down his face, and he found himself to be more frantic as the belt continued to disobey him. There was some emotion he was very unfamiliar with rising up in his chest. His breaths quickened and became more audible as he fumbled with his clothes. 

Aziraphale must have heard him, or had just planned on checking in on him, because he opened the door and poked his head inside. Gabriel quickly turned away, trying to preserve what little was left of his pride. He tried to slow his breathing so it wasn’t as obvious, but his shoulders shook anyway.

“Umm- Here, let me help you,” Aziraphale offered, stepping just in Gabriel’s line of sight. He gave up as Aziraphale undid the belt for him, and loosened his pants. Gabe just stood in place, his face still warm with what he guessed was tears and his heart beating frantically.

Before he knew it, his pants were around his ankles, shoes untied and loosened, and his shirt was unbuttoned, all waiting for Gabe to take the last steps to undress. Which he did with a great deal of lethargy. He found the light blue striped pajamas waiting for him on the bed, and Aziraphale stepped back to let Gabe to try to redress himself. 

It was so different from just snapping clothes onto your back. You had to actually make the effort to put yourself in the clothes. The clothes themselves were a mess. His head tried to go into a hole too small, and there wasn’t even one for his other arm! He flailed around until he felt Aziraphale lift the shirt up and help correct it. The pants were easy enough to figure out, until his foot got caught in the knee and he began to fall forward. Aziraphale caught him and balanced him, hands on both shoulders so he could lean and get them on without worry for falling. 

He didn’t realize how tired he truly was until his head hit the pillow. He didn’t even bother to pull the comforter out to burrow under, he just pulled the blanket from earlier over him.

Gabe was asleep before he was aware of Aziraphale leaving the room. 


	2. The Encounter

Waking up was certainly a process in Gabriel’s mind. Firstly, he wasn’t even aware of his own consciousness. All he knew was the warmth enveloping him, and the softness of whatever was around him. Slowly he became more aware of where he was, and what he was feeling. Mostly, it was all focused on the pressure near his lower torso. It was uncomfortable, to say the least.

Gabe twisted and pulled at the blanket so that he was laying on his other side, and still wrapped up. He was, however, unaware of the small whining sound he made when he did so. It was that sound that alerted Aziraphale of Gabe’s state. He stood from his chair and left his book on the table, an index card used as a bookmark.

When he reached the door of Gabe’s (well, formerly his, but he supposed Gabriel would claim it as his own for the time being) room, he knocked on the door to be polite.

“Care for a spot of breakfast?” 

Gabe looked over his shoulder, his eyes reacting poorly to the new bright light coming from the open doorway. “Yes, thank you,” his voice was rough and gravelly. He found that his throat was dry, and the pressure near his lower body was growing.

Uh oh. He finally remembered what that meant. He had commented on it once when he had seen a few men go into a door with the word ‘Restroom’ on it, and a fellow angel explained to him that humans had to get rid of the things they don’t process. Trouble is, he didn’t get quite into specifics in his questioning. 

He had already embarrassed himself enough in the past 12 hours, what's one more dumb question? He walked to the open doorway, silently lamenting the loss of his warm bed. He stood and watched as Aziraphale set out three plates on a dining room table.

"Do you have a uh… restroom… I can use?" Gabe felt his face heat up, and had no idea what to do with his hands.

"Oh! Dear me. Yes of course, it's just through that door," he pointed to a door on the other side of the room.

Gabriel almost ran in, finding that he was growing more uncomfortable the longer he waited. The door closed behind him, an action he had seen many humans do in the past, and stared at the toilet.

It was then that he knew he really had no idea what to do.

"Uhhhh, Aziraphale?" 

"Yes Gabriel?"

He paused before replying. "How exactly do humans… use the restroom?" 

Aziraphale paled. This was definitely something he had not expected to be doing today. But here he was, and there was no going back now.

"Just, point and relax. It'll come naturally."

Gabe scoffed, and did as he was told. He didn't have to question 'point what?' as he had figured out what appendage was the most uncomfortable.

He walked out of the bathroom a few seconds later.

"Did you wash your hands?" Aziraphale asked after Gabe had taken a few steps out of the doorway.

"... No?"

Aziraphale tutted. Yes, actually tutted, to himself. "Go back in and wash your hands, and flush the toilet. Push the handle on the toilet down until all the water has been sucked in. Use the soap in the bottle by pushing down. There's hand towels hanging on the wall."

Quite frankly, being human was already tiring. Gabe had just woken up and already his toes were cold, and now he has to get lessons on human hygiene. He didn't understand why it was so important to wash your hands after using the restroom, but he also knew there was much he wouldn't understand in the years to come.

When he walked out for the second time, there was another body occupying the space. It was Aziraphale's demon friend, Crawley or Cowley or something.

His first instinct was to  _ smite. _ That plan was thrown away when he reached for his power and came back empty.

His second plan? Stare him down. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Aziraphale, back turned to him and the demon. He was standing in front of some big box… thing. Gabe really had no idea, and frankly didn't care.

"Let's get some day clothes for you," Aziraphale stated as he turned to the two of them. He shot Crowley a warning glare, which made the demon turn his attention away, but his facial expression did not change. 

Aziraphale led the way back to Gabe's new bedroom, and a wardrobe he had never noticed before. Whether Aziraphale just manifested it in there, or if he was truly so tired he did not see it, Gabe would never know. Gabe stood a few feet behind as Aziraphale rummaged through the drawers, setting a few articles of clothing on top.

Finally he gathered then all in his arms and turned with a flair of drama, and a huge smile on his face. Gabe reluctantly returned the smile, which he was surprised about. Was it a human thing to return smiles?

"Thanks," Gabe accepted the clothes.

"I trust you can do this on your own this time?" Aziraphale asked with a cocked eyebrow.

Crowley laughed outside the room. Damn demon. "Yes, I can manage," he said through gritted teeth.

"Breakfast is just about done, join us whenever you're ready!" 

Aziraphale went out to the room, and Gabe could hear him reprimand Crowley for his earlier outburst. 

Gabriel struggled with the new clothes, but refused to ask for help. He had to figure some things out for himself. After five minutes, he had the pants and t-shirt on that was chosen for him. It was nothing extraordinary, just simply blue, stiff pants and a dark lavender shirt.

When he walked out of the room for the second time that day, he was met with Aziraphale and Crowley at the table. However, Crowley had a snake wrapped around his neck and shoulders. Neither seemed to pay the snake any extra attention.

The two humanoids looked up when Gabe entered the room. One smiled, the other grimaced. Take a guess at who did what.

"Don't tell me there's  _ another _ demon in here!" Gabe complained.

Crowley hisses at Gabe, forked tongue out and everything. The snake around his neck seemed to feed off his hostility and gave the former angel a menacing look as well.

"No, no. He's not a demon. Only demon here is Crowley. He's just our pet snake, Pete." Aziraphale stroked Pete’s head.

“Do you have a problem with snakes?” Crowley asked. His first words to the new human, and they were a test.

Gabe looked between the two, both of which were staring at him.

“I love all of God’s creations.”

Crowley looked at Aziraphale sticking his tongue out as if he had eaten something unpleasant and trying to get the taste off of his tongue. Aziraphale shot Gabe a short, but polite smile before he turned his head to give Crowley The Look™ that made him stop overreacting.

Gabriel took his seat at the table, having obviously passing his first test between the two. No matter how much he despised snakes, there truly was no where else for him to turn. So it made no sense to make enemies of your host’s friends.

“What’s this?” He gestured to the items on a plate in the middle of the table. There were about ten of them arranged in a circular pattern, a few sitting on top of the others. He honestly had no idea what they were, the paper wrapping around the bottom giving no hints whatsoever. Do humans eat paper? 

“They’re muffins! Crowley picked them up on the way here this morning,” Aziraphale brightened greatly. 

Gabriel nodded, as if understanding perfectly what muffins were. His blank look on his face gave Crowley a reason to laugh.

“Oh! This is going to be good!” he kicked his chair back, leaning on the back two legs.

Gabe’s face burned bright red as Crowley continued to laugh. Pete, still resting on Crowley’s shoulders, looked at the demon in confusion before making his way to Aziraphale’s shoulders. He accepted the snake and helped him wrap around his neck.

Gabe felt something stir up inside him. He felt stupid, especially in front of a demon. His former arch nemesis, seeing him at his weakest. 

“Don’t embarrass him!” Aziraphale stage-whispered to Crowley as he reached for a muffin for himself.

Ah, that’s what it was. Embarrassment. He reached for a muffin and watched how Aziraphale ate it. He unwrapped the paper from around the bottom, much more carefully than Aziraphale had.

When he put the ‘muffin’ in his mouth, he realized how hungry he was. He must have finished the first muffin in thirty seconds, and the second one in much less time. How could he have not eaten before? Human food was a wonder! It was moist and sweet, with little blue spheroid things that gave it an almost fruity taste.

He looked up as he reached for the third, and saw as Aziraphale and Crowley were both watching him with wide, surprised eyes. Gabe flashed them a quick smile, and spoke around the food in his mouth.

“These are good.”

Crowley snorted.

Gabe looked at Aziraphale’s hand, and noticed that he was only half way done with his first muffin. Oh, he should probably slow down. He ate this one with much more purpose, being mindful of every bite, and how it tasted.

“Does all human food taste like this?”

Aziraphale swallowed his bite before he answered. “Ah, not exactly. There are different kinds of muffins and similar things we call ‘ _ pastries _ ’ that taste somewhat similar. But there are many more kinds of food that all taste different, but still good.”

He gave the muffin that remained in his hand an impressed look. 

After finishing the third muffin, he decided it was time for him to be done. It had nothing to do with the uncomfortable feeling growing in his lower abdomen.

He watched Aziraphale finish his first, which was also his only, muffin. Crowley never ate, and he only seemed to pay attention to Aziraphale and his snake. 

Who could like snakes? Biblically, they are the literal representation of sin and temptation. They slither on the ground and it is the nature of angels to rid the world of temptation. Well, most angels. Aziraphale seemed to dote on Pete, spoiling him in the most obvious of ways. It could also be a metaphor for how Aziraphale loves Crowley. 

As dumb as Gabe is, he is not an idiot. When the Horsemen met at the airbase and he ran into the two of them together, he could feel the mutual adoration radiating off of them. Now that he was human, he felt less of that, but they showed it in more obvious and outward ways.

The whole concept of emotion was still a hard concept to grasp. What was the point of it?

“So, Gabe-y boy. Let’s say we go down to the shop together to get you a mobile?” Crowley turned his attention to Gabe. “And maybe while we’re at it we can convince Aziraphale to get one too.”

Pete looked at Gabe as if he completely understood what Crowley said, and waited for Gabe to answer.

“Okay…” He responded to the question, deciding to not ask what a mobile was to avoid embarrassment. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> feedback makes the happy part in an author's brain go "YAYYYY"


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note: I hc that Gabe made the color purple, which is why his eyes are like that. Also I remember in church talking about how the real forbidden fruit was not an apple, but supposedly was a pomegranate.
> 
> Also we see how soft Crowley can be.

Gabe found himself in Aziraphale’s flat alone that evening. They had planned on going on a date, and would not let the sudden appearance of the ex-archangel ruin it.

His stomach gurgled as the day grew longer, and he looked up to the dining room table. Muffins were still left over from that morning, and Aziraphale had also left a plate of sandwiches and a bowl of fruit out. Crowley had laughed as he handed Gabe an apple, and Aziraphale was attempting to hide his giggles at Gabe’s shocked face. He had absolutely refused to take a bite out of it. So, he went with the pomegranate seeds in it’s own little container instead.

Despite the seed in the middle of each pod, he found that the reward of the burst of juice to be worth attempting to chew through the seed. He’d roll each one in his mouth a bit too, getting used to how his tongue worked. He got the hang of it after a while. This time, instead of scarfing down his breakfast with little attention to taste, he savored the flavor the pomegranate seeds possessed. 

He placed the empty container back on the table, unsure what to do with it. His head throbbed dully, but he decided it was a side effect of having your angelic grace ripped out of you and being given a soul. He was also cold. Another effect of being newly mortal? Probably. 

He decided to sit on the couch in the backroom of the bookshop, bringing his blanket and a book Aziraphale had given him.  _ Rules for Being Human _ the cover displayed. Well, everyone starts somewhere, right?

The fire crackled as it burned brightly. It gave the room a brilliant orange glow. Gabe turned on the lamp next to the couch anyway before he settled into the couch. He was halfway done with the first chapter when he sneezed.

Gabe had  _ sneezed! _

Never before had that happened to him in his millenia of existing. So he panicked. He wasn’t aware that he was panicking, all he was aware of was the fear of dying. Why was he scared of dying? Gabe felt even more uneasy after he couldn’t figure out why he feared his mortality. His breaths came in short bursts and tears leaked down his face. The book was long forgotten and abandoned on the floor.

_ Why are humans so fragile? _ He questioned as he pulled his knees up to his chest to hug them. He placed his head on his knees and sobbed.

That’s how Crowley and Aziraphale found him, an undetermined amount of time later.

The first thing that happened was Aziraphale dropping his bag of leftover food. This sprung Crowley into action to figure out what was wrong. He raced to Gabriel’s side and kneeled on the ground. He traced shapes onto Gabe’s back as Aziraphale ran to help as well.

He was a sight to see. His shoulders shook with the shaky and unsteady breaths he was taking. His head hung into his knees, still being ferociously hugged into his body. There was liquid streaming down his face, and he simply could not stop it. Why couldn’t he stop it?

Gabe leaned into Crowley’s touch as soon as he felt it. Honestly, it felt good to have any kind of contact. He didn’t care that it was coming from a demon.

His chest ached but his sobs began to slow when Aziraphale sat next to him and had moved Gabe so they were leaning on each other.

"I want- I wanna go  _ home, _ " Gabriel croaked between breaths. He buried his face in Az's shoulder and latched onto the angel's body.

Even though Crowley was a demon, he was not entirely heartless. Despite the fact he would not let  _ anyone _ get away with calling him nice, you can't be a nanny for years without the ability to empathize and to coddle.

Though he had every right to let Gabe suffer, he truly couldn't stand the sight of his brother in such a state.

His name before Crowley was Crawley. But before that, he was Raphael. No one remembered him, nor is he going to tell anyone (other than Aziraphale, but he has to work his way up to that yet) who he is.

Gabriel and Raphael were close brothers who spent centuries and millennia together. They both were curious about the new angel's being created, but Raphael managed to Fall. Whereas Gabriel had kept his Graces for another 6,000 years or so longer.

Crowley removed his sunglasses. He remained kneeling in front of Gabe, but took his hands from Aziraphale's side into his own.

"I know you miss Heaven," he began weakly. "I've been there before. That empty hole that nothing seems to fill that was once pure and divine love. It took me centuries to finally get used to it." 

Gabe had stopped sobbing, but tear still ran down his face. His eyes were glassy and stared off into the distance, but he was still listening to Crowley.

"I was an angel too, remember," he dared a small smile. "Do you remember how carefree we were? No sin, just pure love for one another?"

Gabe nodded and looked at his hands clutched in the demon's own.

"After I found myself in Hell, I tried my hardest to find that again. I looked everywhere in those dirty halls, but I couldn't find it."

"Then I was told to make some trouble up in Eden," he looked at Aziraphale, who was also listening intently. "I'll admit, I wasn't sure of what I was getting myself into. But I found myself in a friendship, and eventually a relationship, that would begin to fill that hole in your chest."

Aziraphale had tears streaming down his face, but had a smile on his face that would put the Cheshire Cat to shame.

"You will find love on Earth. Between the death and destruction, there is happiness and carelessness that could rival what Heaven had long before the War."

Gabriel was reduced to sniffles, but he still had his eyes cast down.

"Hey, look at me." Crowley ordered softly. When Gabe looked into Crowley's eyes, the demon saw the Gabe he knew all those years ago. His eyes were still violet, and despite the redness and puffiness, he was still the Archangel Gabriel behind it all.

"You can make your own Heaven on Earth. Trust me."

He nodded his head quickly and squeezed Crowley's hands. He longed for more physical contact. Anything to ground him and take him away from his thoughts.

"Okay," he sullenly whispered. Aziraphale had hugged him into his side tighter, and Gabe allowed himself to fall back into the angel's side.

He sneezed again.

“Bless you,” Aziraphale said. Crowley hissed.

The tranquility of the moment was ruined, with Crowley overreacting to a blessing happening in his vicinity. Gabe and Aziraphale watched as Crowley stood quickly and replace his sunglasses.

“Anyway, you’re still a dick, Gabriel.”

He didn’t even bother to try to respond. He was too weary to think. And Aziraphale was so  _ warm! _ On instinct he sniffed his nose, which scared him again.

Crowley had left the room at this point, so he turned his attention back to Aziraphale. 

“Am I dying?” he asked the angel sincerely. Aziraphale looked at him, and felt his forehead.

“Oh dear,” he muttered. “I’m afraid that you have caught a cold.”

Gabe planted his face back into Aziraphale’s shoulder, muttering something that sounded very similar to  _ stupid mortal body _ . He groaned as Aziraphale stood. Gabriel allowed himself to crumple onto the couch in the absence of support.

“Is it fatal?”

Aziraphale laughed. “No, it’s actually quite common. But I’m afraid there is yet to be a cure. I’ve heard that chicken noodle soup is a nice treatment, as well as drinking plenty of fluids and resting.” He picked up the now-cold leftovers on the floor and threw them in the trash. 

Gabe was handed a glass of water. “Sip on this while I go make some soup for you,” Aziraphale ordered. He sat up and took a few sips of water before he put it on the coffee table a few feet from the couch.

He was left to his own devices while Aziraphale made the soup and Crowley was probably doting on his snake. He groaned as he noticed his head hurt even more than before.

“I hate being human.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I need to give Gabe a hobby for future chapters. Comment with ideas please! I'm having trouble finding one I like for him, and my friends are having an equally hard time. 
> 
> Also I live off of feedback, so please feel free to comment on anything. I love hearing your predictions and theories!


	4. If This Is To Be My Heaven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah I know it’s been sad and angsty for the past few chapters but I promise we do get to see Gabe be happy.

Sleep didn’t come for Gabriel as easily as it did the first night. His head ached and he couldn’t stop sneezing. After eating Az’s soup and finishing two glasses of water, it was determined that it was time for Gabriel to try to sleep it off. Harder said than done, apparently.

He had four blankets on the bed already, and was contemplating asking Aziraphale for another one. Eventually he settled with curling in on himself. Sleep came as a relief, no matter how terrified he was of it. 

For the first time in his life, he had dreamed. At first he hadn’t even realized that it was a dream. He was sitting at his desk, filing a report. He could see Michael on the phone in the near distance, but paid her no mind.

He noticed what he was filing in big bold letters at the top of the paper. “ **EXECUTION ORDER** ” which poor angel would he have to kill today? Gabriel flipped through the list of crimes. Pride was a common theme, but incompetence is what struck him. There were few angels he would describe as incompetent. Even Aziraphale was capable of getting things done, it was just a matter of getting him to do it.

He finally got through the ream of paper to the final page. As with all of God’s orders, the header proclaimed “ **ORDER FROM GOD: EXECUTE IMMEDIATELY** ” and had Metatron’s signature on the bottom of the paper. The word execute here was more of an order to do the task, in this case it had a double meaning.

He had to scan the paper in order to find the angel’s name. Execution orders were rare enough that he had yet to memorize their format. 

He stiffened when he saw his own name.

There had to be a mistake. No way was he the one to be killed!  _ Do you question the judgement of the Almighty? _ A voice rang in his head.

“What is the matter Gabriel?” Michael asked, finally getting up and hanging up her phone. He didn’t respond, he just meekly pointed to his name under the subheader “ **TO BE KILLED** ” and allowed her to make of it what she will. “Oh.” was all she managed.

“What are we going to do?” He was shaking.

“God’s will.” Michael replied, stoic and emotionless. 

She brandished a fiery sword. Based on the strong scent of sulphur, he could tell it was hellfire. He tried to back up and get away from her, but found that he was firmly planted on his seat. He couldn’t do anything but watch and plead for his life as Michael poised the sword.

“You don’t have to do this.”

She smirked. The  _ audacity _ to smirk at her brother as she’s going in for the kill! “Yes I do. You know it as well as anyone else here. There is no ignoring orders.”

He screamed as he felt the sword plunge into his chest. 

Gabriel awoke covered in sweat and hyperventilating. He had shot up so he was resting on his arms and body facing the door. Hot liquids were running down his face again, and this time he had a firmer grasp as to why.

Aziraphale shot through the door. It made Gabe jump, but he recognized that he wasn’t a threat right away. Crowley was right behind him, but not quite as vigilant as his counterpart.

“What happened?”

Gabe kept breathing deeply and struggled to form words. He was so lost and confused, from what he saw it was still dark outside. Which meant he still had to go back to sleep (according to what Aziraphale told him about human sleeping patterns.)

“Was it a nightmare?” Aziraphale asked. Gabe gave him a puzzled look. “A nightmare is a bad dream.”

Gabriel nodded, finally able to start to stabilize his breathing. Crowley rolled his eyes and walked back to wherever he had been before Gabe woke. Aziraphale paused to make sure Gabe was really alright, but eventually turned to leave.

“Wait!” He had no idea why he called to the angel. Aziraphale turned his attention back to the ex-angel. “I’m… Uh, please stay?” He had no right to ask him for a favor, but he was relieved when Aziraphale materialized a chair in the room and sat.

Gabe laid back down and pulled the covers up to his face. The need to sleep was stronger than any residual fear left over from his nightmare.

If Aziraphale used a few miracles to make sure Gabe slept peacefully, no one would really blame him.

Sun was peeking through the curtains, illuminating the room. It danced in the dust particles floating in the air. Cars were honking outside, sounding not unlike angry geese. Gabe’s eyes opened slowly, adjusting to the light.

Eventually he managed to work himself up to getting out of bed and getting dressed. It was a long process but managed without help.

He saw Aziraphale donning a coat and telling Crowley to put one on as well. Of course, the demon said he’d be fine, that it’d take a bit more than some cold to take him down.

“Where are you guys going?” He asked.

“Oh! Good to see you’re up! We were just heading out for a quick walk around the park.” Aziraphale responded. “Are you feeling any better?”

Actually, Gabe did feel a lot better. “Yeah, I am.”

"Oh, splendid! Maybe you'd like to join us?" Aziraphale elbowed Crowley when he opened his mouth to argue, despite the fact that Aziraphale was looking at Gabe and Crowley was standing just beside him.

Gabriel hadn't been outside since he was on Aziraphale's doorstep. He did want to go out, but didn't want to get cold again.

As if Aziraphale had read his thoughts (maybe he had, but Gabe wanted to think he had more privacy than that) he snapped and Gabriel had a thick and fluffy coat on, along with thick socks, nice boots, and a warm pair of jeans. 

“Really angel?” Crowley groaned. 

“Yes!” He spun and faced Crowley, shooting him another one of his Looks ™.

Even though Gabriel was feeling very unwelcome on this adventure, he couldn’t help but be happy to just go out.

They began their trek to the park on a great foot. Except for the wind. But after a few blocks Gabe got somewhat used to it. 

It was a nice day for a walk. The clouds had parted for the morning, allowing the blue sky to shine onto the city. The snow had settled on the sidewalks and ledges. Footprints blended together forming a long line of slush. The streets weren’t as busy as they normally were, for which Gabe was thankful for. This meant less loud noises to frighten him. 

He fell behind his hosts. Aziraphale and Crowley were talking to each other, about what, Gabe didn’t care to know. At some point Crowley had begun to shiver. Gabriel hadn’t even noticed until Aziraphale stopped to put his scarf on the demon’s neck. 

They continued forward, and Aziraphale’s hand had snaked its way into Crowley’s. The two fell into step with each other as well. Whenever Aziraphale looked up at Crowley, or laughed at a joke, his eyes sparkled. Not only did his eyes sparkle, but his whole face lit up in complete adoration. 

If Crowley wasn’t wearing his sunglasses, Gabriel was sure he’d see similar reactions in his eyes too. They seemed more than comfortable with one another, providing support and protection to their counterpart.

How had he never noticed it before?

Well, he supposed he did, it had just never really sunk in. Nor did he think about what it meant to the two of them.

Angels are beings of love. It is quite literally what they were made to do. So how Gabriel had missed the obvious in front of him, he didn’t know. It made sense, he supposed. He didn’t spend much time on Earth before, so he probably got used to the feeling of love all around him.

As a mortal, though, he no longer possessed that sense. It would take a true idiot to look at what he’s seeing, and to not come to that conclusion. He may be stupid, but he wasn’t an idiot.

Gabriel felt bad for outwardly admitting his disgust to demons, especially to Aziraphale. Now that he thought back on every mention of Crowley in conversation before he became mortal, he remembered that Aziraphale would quiet down and speak in short sentences. It was such a blatant contrast to the way he’d speak normally, especially about food.

He realized that Aziraphale had been lying to his face for the past 6,000 years. No wonder Aziraphale had shut up about Crowley, he didn’t want anything to slip!

Aziraphale had just made a joke. It sent the angel and demon into a fit of laughter. Gabe hadn’t caught it, but did see how they looked at each other.

They made it to the park, for which Gabriel was happy about. He had been almost run into more times in the short walk there than he had in his entire life.

It reminded him of Heaven, all the white blanketing the Earth. He tried to search for a word, or words, to describe what he was feeling at the moment. Finally he settled on 'bittersweet melancholy' after hearing Crowley mention the word in a discussion on Queen songs.

Memories flooded his mind. Memories of before the war, when he’d run amuck with his siblings in Paradise. The jovial laughter as they hoped and lept and flew through the Almighty’s creation. The feeling of holiness and love surrounding them.

The wind blew again, causing the bare tree branches to sway, causing the shadows to dance on the snow.

He remembered what Crowley told him last night. In that rare display of kindness to anyone outside of Aziraphale, he'd actually given good advice. Gabe knew Crowley could speak from experience. 

More specifically, he recalled the bit about making your own Heaven on Earth. Well, if this was to be his Heaven, Gabriel could find little to complain about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick warning, the next chapter is going to be me praising Queen. That's it. Listen to A Night At The Opera to know what's going on.
> 
> Also I'm still accepting ideas for hobbies for Gabe!


	5. Good Company (and other ways to Laze on a Sunday Afternoon)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen to "A Night At The Opera" by Queen while reading this chapter. The songs go in order, so as long as you can keep up with the album (which I may have the pacing off) you should understand what's going on.

Except cold. Gabe sure could find the cold to be a bit much.

His coat and scarf definitely did help fight it off. He’d also pulled the hood up on his head after seeing several people walking by doing the same.

They walked back to the bookshop at a slow pace. This time Gabriel was invited into the conversation. They talked about where to start to immerse him into modern human culture. Aziraphale had wanted him to read the classics, and Crowley said they’d save time if they all just watched the movie adaptations.

This very much displeased Aziraphale. Gabriel remained adamant that he’d be abstaining on the deciding vote between the two.

“You were talking about Queen earlier. What’s Queen?” He’d asked innocently, trying to change the subject.

Crowley stopped walking, causing Gabriel to run directly into his back, and Aziraphale to turn to the two of them at breakneck speed. 

“What’s Queen? WHAT’S QUEEN???” Crowley became angry quickly. Well, angry wasn’t the right word to use. More like dumbfounded. “Nevermind the movies or books angel, that’s what we’re doing when we get back.”

There was no use protesting the demon. Even Aziraphale enjoyed Queen. 

Sure enough, as soon as they stepped through the door of the bookshop, Crowley went to the record player and began to put a record on it. He was greeted with a quick piano melody, then suddenly some very angry guitar noises.

A scream, then it stilled to something more bearable. 

Crowley helped Aziraphale out of his coat as he began to speak to Gabriel. “So this album has a few of their most popular songs on it, like Bohemian Rhapsody and You’re My Best Friend.” Those names were not familiar in any way to Gabriel, but he continued to listen anyway.

“Don’t forget Love of My Life!” Aziraphale reminded the demon.

“I didn’t forget it, angel, just gonna save it for when it plays.”

By this time, Gabriel had his winter gear off, and was warming his toes by the roaring fire.

“There are lots of great songs on this album. This one’s called Death on Two Legs, and it’s about one of the band’s previous managers,” Crowley walked out of the room to go up the stairs. Gabriel was left with Aziraphale on the couch, listening to the song. He worried at the lines telling this character to commit suicide, but otherwise enjoyed the song.

It reminded him of Beezelbub. 

Crowley returned with Pete wrapped around his arm just in time for some bright piano playing. The melody for this one he actually recognized. From where, he could not place. So Gabe decided to keep his mouth shut.

Crowley grinned when the next song came on. He mouthed the words to Aziraphale, who only shook his head in fondness. The man singing had a really raspy voice, and for some reason loved his car?

Humans were confusing. Why would this man prefer a car to a nice woman? He is literally placing the value of a woman’s company underneath the value of a carbonator.

“The guy singing is the guy who wrote it. His name’s Roger Taylor, and he’s the drummer. He REALLY wanted this song to be on the B-side of Bohemian Rhapsody, but the rest of the band had other ideas. So he locked himself in a cupboard and refused to come out until they gave it to him.” Crowley explained to Gabriel, softly stroking a relaxed Pete.

Gabriel was going to ask what a B-side was, but then Aziraphale decided to speak. “Oh! I do quite like this song!”

It was a nice sounding introduction, he’d give him that. It was kinda jarring to go from such a hardcore song about being in love with a car to a nice and sweet song about a best friend. Gabe brushed it off easily though, and continued to listen.

He found himself yearning to find a best friend as the song went on. Before, his purpose in life was to follow direct orders from God, and to thwart evil. Now that he was mortal, he struggled to find meaning behind living. If only he had a person to give him that reason.

It was hard to be upset about it in this moment, as the song was simply too happy sounding to let the feelings sink in too far. 

“This is one of my favorites,” Crowley stated. For the rest of the song, he stayed quiet to let Gabe listen to the lyrics. 

It wasn’t hard to discern that the song was about space travel. He found himself quite liking the singer’s voice, and the accompanying background vocals. Overall, the song did have a beat to it, and he found it hard to not tap his foot to the beat (though he didn’t know  _ why, _ he just knew that it was an enjoyable experience.) The lyrics were sad, especially the last few lines. He almost could connect to them on some weird level.

The guitar was back. Gabriel was questioning who hurt the writer of this song. Before he could define how he felt about the song, the next song had begun. It was a very catchy piano again, and had some very high pitched notes being hit. He vaguely recognized one of the sounds as an instrument a demon had created. It was supposed to be easy to play, for kids to annoy their parents. This one was hard to find annoying though.

Long. That’s how Gabriel would describe The Prophet’s Song. It had its good qualities, but it was a stark contrast from what the previous song had been. There were quite a lot of good harmonies though, for which he couldn’t complain. The guitar put him on edge for the entirety of the first movement (for that’s the appropriate terms to seperate parts of an opera, right?)

He couldn’t believe the notes one of the voices was able to hit. The isolated vocal part had been impressive. It felt like the voices were coming from all around him, sending shivers down his spine. The sudden reappearance of the guitars made him jump. Crowley grinned when he saw Gabe jump, and he noticed Aziraphale was also trying his best to hide his smile.

Ah. This was Love of My Life. The introduction was very welcoming. Gabriel relaxed and closed his eyes, attempting to allow the music consume all of his attention. This song gave him a very similar feeling to what You’re My Best Friend had given him. For well over 6,000 years, Gabriel had been fine without having a ‘companion,’ but now he felt something in his chest ache. 

The couch shifted, and Gabriel had discovered Crowley and Aziraphale were now leaning on each other. Pete had found his way into their laps, and they each had one arm wrapped around the other’s back.

Before the next song could begin, Crowley waved his hand, making the needle rise and the music to stop.

“I knew the band, all those years ago,” the demon began. “I was good friends with all of them, but Freddie was special. Freddie is the lead singer, and the piano player for the majority of the songs. He was a songwriter and entertainer. More importantly though, he was a great friend.”

Crowley’s voice had grown quieter, but he still wished to spread Freddie’s story and legacy. “People like to argue about who this song was written about. Was it his girlfriend, Mary, or Paul Prenter. Prenter was a wanker, just to let you know. But neither of those are right. He wrote it about me and ‘Zira here.” Aziraphale absolutely beamed, and Crowley gave him heart eyes.

“Freddie never met him, but I was always talking about him, apparently. Freddie wrote it about us, and even told me in private after one of his shows.”

Gabriel had to digest the information he was given. Was this an accurate portrayal of how the demon and angel felt about each other? Judging by how they embraced, and seemed to know each other better than they did themselves, yeah, it was. 

“It’s beautiful,” Gabriel remarked. Crowley nodded and muttered something under his breath in agreement, but didn’t make any words truly come out.

The needle dropped, and the mood of the room had shifted. Words were hard to find when it came to describing this song. It was an odd sort of happiness.

The next song was a shock. He’d use the word rollercoaster, if he knew what a rollercoaster was. The piano was nice, as it was with the rest of the album. Then Freddie started to sing about murder? It definitely took a lot of work to put this together, that Gabriel could tell. 

The solo was magnificent. He could feel the movement rise and flow through his chest. When it stopped, his heart jolted when the operatic section started. Again, the singular voice had been hitting some amazingly high notes throughout this section. His ears perked up at the mention of Beezlebub, but nothing of value was mentioned. The faster paced section had Crowley headbanging, which only added to Gabriel’s confusion. It morphed into something much slower, and too soon, it ended. The last song felt like a farewell to the listeners to Gabriel’s inexperienced ears. 

“So, how’d you like it?” Aziraphale asked, shifting Pete to Crowley and standing to return the vinyl to its proper place.

How did Gabriel like it? He gave it a few seconds of thought to collect what was running through his head.

“I loved it.” He stated simply.

“‘Course ya did. It’s Queen!” Crowley stated

Aziraphale held up another album to the two. “Ready for the next one?” he asked with a large grin on his face. This album was very brightly colored, divided into 4 sections, with a face drawn into each one. 

Frankly, the look on Crowley’s face scared Gabriel, but he could do little to help it as Aziraphale dropped the needle onto the album.

They spent the rest of the night giving Gabriel a history lesson on Queen. By the end, he was worn out, but glad he’d given the demon a chance to show his passion to the ex-angel.

Completely content, Gabriel made his way into his bedroom. He lethargically changed into some pajamas, and fell promptly asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I realize the majority of this chapter is me praising Queen. I will not apologize for it. I am a HUGE Queen fan, and when I first watched GO, I was ecstatic to find the entire soundtrack was Queen songs. Also, the background music when the bodyswap plan goes into action and they both get kidnapped, Lazing on a Sunday Afternoon is what the band is playing. Fun fact.


	6. A Color Crisis and a Visitor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the few mortals who made it up to heaven and then return to earth spoke of colors that don’t exist on earth. I like to think it has to do with our mortal eyes, and when our soul leaves our body we see everything as it should appear. Angels and demons don’t have this problem, as they do not have souls, and don’t conform to mortal rules.

“What happened to all the colors?” Gabe asked, looking up from his phone. He was rolled up into as many blankets as he could find, and seated on the recliner right by the fireplace. Aziraphale and Crowley were on the couch in the same room, but Aziraphale was reading a book. Crowley had his head in the angel’s lap, and was following along with him.

Aziraphale stilled the hand stroking Crowley’s hair. “What do you mean?” he asked the ex-Archangel.

“Well, there’s less of them,” he began. “In Heaven, there were more of them, next to the white walls and floors.” He shifted and sat up. He showed his phone screen to the pair. “Here is a rainbow, but instead of seeing the 1,492 colors it’s made of, I just see six!” He began to grow upset.

“I see ‘em.” Crowley stated, not at all being helpful. Aziraphale let him know as much by slapping the back of his head lightly.

“I’m not sure dear, there is a thing humans can have called ‘color blindness,’ so I suppose we can see how we figure that out,” Aziraphale offered, placing a scrap piece of paper between the pages of his book, and forcing Crowley off of him. “Would you go get the laptop and help Gabriel get set up? I’m going to see what I can find in my human biology books.”

Crowley let out a huge sigh, letting Aziraphale know how much this task is inconveniencing him. Gabe moved out from his blanket burrito, and to the couch so that he could see what Crowley was doing.

The demon didn’t even bother getting up, he just materialized the laptop onto the table. He searched on google the very simple phrase ‘color blind test’ and shoved the computer to Gabe. 

He was forced to look at circles with many different colors. It told him to enter what number he saw in the circles. Though some were much more difficult than others, he made it to the end of the test. He was dismayed to find he had normal vision by a human’s standards. This meant it had something to do with being mortal.

Aziraphale returned with a large book in hand. “It says here that humans have three color cones in their eyes, which results in trichromatic color vision.” he was reading straight from the page. “The cones have a specialized range of frequencies that they can pick up and send the message to the brain, where it creates the image being presented in color.”

He stopped and looked at Gabriel sadly. “I’m sorry, looks like it’s just a part of being human.”

Gabe swallowed the feeling crawling up his throat. Suddenly, he found pent-up energy even he didn’t know he had.

“My eyes!” he cried, much to the confusion of the other two. He ran around the bottom floor of the bookshop in search of a reflective surface. 

“What about your eyes?” Crowley asked

“Are they still purple?” What kind of person didn’t own a mirror? Aren’t demons supposed to be vain? It surprised Gabriel that Crowley didn’t have at least one laying around.

“Here,” Crowley started, picking up Gabe’s long forgotten phone. “Take a look at this.”

Gabe spun around to find his own face on the screen. Oh, right, he remembered being told something about the cameras on the phone. It was difficult to see his eye color in the screen, as he had to have one eye in the shot of the camera itself, and look at the screen at the same time. Eventually he figured if he just took a picture, he could review it.

Which is what he did.

Relief spread through his bones as he saw the familiar violet eyes in the pixels of the screen. He let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and held the phone close to his chest.

Yeah, he was probably overreacting. He also wasn’t human less than a week ago, so Crowley figured he should give him a break. What he was going to do, however, was figure out what had gotten Gabe so worked up.

“So, what’s up with your eyes staying purple being so important?”

Aziraphale had placed the book back on its shelf and joined the conversation. Well, lent an ear. He didn’t know how much talking he’d get in, or if it’ll be more of a tangent Gabe was going to run on.

“You know when God first made the archangels?” he asked.

“Yeah, I do.” Crowley answered. Both Gabriel and Aziraphale turned their attention to the demon. “Well, I’ve heard of what happened.” Phew, that was a close one.

“Right… God allowed us all a creation to give to Heaven. Michael chose to create lightbulbs, to illuminate the darkness where God could not be found. Well, I decided to create the color purple. I wanted a color to represent the power God held, and how She is everywhere and anywhere. It didn’t really stick on Earth though, but I still held onto my creation.”

Tears glinted in his eyes, but he was smiling.

There was a knock at the door. Aziraphale yelled in the general direction “We’re closed!” and continued to share a tender moment with the two others.

The knocking persisted and shouts could be heard through the door. “Aziraphale! I know you’re in there!” a female voice, and it sounded familiar.

“Anathema!” Aziraphale exclaimed and rushed to open the door for her. “So nice to see you dear!” he grinned and outstretched his arms. She gladly went in for a hug.

“Hi! Just in town to pick up some things, and thought I’d stop by.”

They released from the embrace and she stepped inside, Aziraphale closing the door behind her. She stood off to the side of the room, holding her hands right in front of her dress.

That’s when Crowley and Gabriel decided to round the pillars of bookshelves and make their presence known.

“Anathema! So good to see you!” Crowley welcomed her as well, but was much less physically affectionate about it. He did sport a huge grin spreading across his face. “How’s Newt?”

“Oh same old, same old. He keeps trying to figure out why he is no good at computers. I don’t see why he just can’t accept the fact that some people just aren’t made for them!” She kept her eyes on Gabriel. “I recognize you. You were on the airbase, weren’t you?”

She pointed an accusatory finger at the former archangel. “You were an angel then, but your aura is  _ way _ different now. What happened?”

Crowley decided to answer before Aziraphale could start at the beginning. Even before the garden, if he knew his boyfriend well enough.

“Long story short, he tried to kill my angel, God didn’t agree, so now he’s human.” Simple and to the point, with no unnecessary details to possibly trigger a panic attack.

Gabe nodded. “That about sums it up.”

“You know, since I first met you, I’ve wondered why you sounded American. Or why accents existed in Heaven in general.” Her hands planted themselves on her hips.

“I’m- not sure.” Gabriel answered honestly. Come to think of it, he did sound different compared to Aziraphale and Crowley. “I sound American?” he wanted to make sure he heard her right.

“Yeah, maybe from somewhere in the Midwest if I had to guess.” Anathema suddenly noticed the time. “I really should get going, make sure the house isn’t burned down. See you later Aziraphale, Crowley, and…” she trailed off, realizing he had never given her his name.

“Gabriel.” Aziraphale informed her when Gabe didn’t.

“Right,” she strode out the door and away from sight.

Gabriel had never been to America before. He knew of its existence, ever since it was discovered people didn’t shut up about it. Gluttony was rampant in many parts of the country, and it had earned a reputation in Heaven. Now, he can’t deny his curiosity. What was America really like? Surely gluttony cannot be the only defining feature in the nation. Anathema also said something about a midwest, which also brought up some questions.

Crowley and Aziraphale left to resume their reading position on the couch. Gabriel wandered over to the discarded laptop and picked it up. He hunkered back down on the recliner, rewrapping his blankets around his body.

Figuring out how to use the laptop wasn’t that difficult of a process. It took him some time to get used to it though. Nevertheless, he was determined to figure out everything he could about America, if it took him all night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the wait, I really struggled coming up with a plot for this one. now i think i have a good idea for the next few chapters. also im from the midwest so this makes things a whole lot easier for me in terms of slang and research.


	7. Panic and It's Aftermath

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gabe remembers what it took for him to fully become mortal, so lots of gore and body horror ahead. If you can’t read that, I’ll italicise the instance and you can begin reading when the italics end. It starts at the very beginning of this chapter, and ends at the end of the italics

_ Gabriel was in pain. Hot, searing pain that stretched across his back and to his wingtips. Every movement sent hellfire through his body. His wings were restrained by chains, clamping tightly on the base and where they met his back. There was also a pair of chains right at the joint on his wings, holding them in a position to mock a take-off. _

_ Gabriel himself was being pushed into the cold, hard ground in a chamber in Heaven. He didn’t even know this chamber existed. It was where Michael cast Lucifer into Hell, removing his Heavenly Grace forcibly. It was cold, so much colder than anything he had ever experienced. No, he couldn’t let the cold get to him. He was an archangel, unbothered by something as trivial as the temperature. _

_ It wasn’t the temperature though, was it? It was the lack of God’s never ending love. This had to be the only area in the universe God choose to look away. She ordered her angels to extract his wings and grace, and turned to more important matters. _

_ Gabe cried out when Uriel began to cut. "Please! Please stop! Please! Uriel stop!" He begged Uriel, who just looked at his crying face with indifference and continued. _

_ She started at his wingtips, sawing through the thin muscle and bone to permanently ground him. The cuts were uneven, and a mockery. This was meant to prevent his escaping, as if the chains on his wings weren't enough. _

_ Uriel's name meant 'the light of God,' and her purpose was to help achieve our higher self. She was meant to shine light on strengths or weaknesses, and so here she was. Gabriel couldn't help but wonder what all of this meant. How was he supposed to be his higher self if he no longer has his power? _

_ The blade being used was dull, Gabriel's own from the war many years ago. He hadn't used it since, and frankly, had little intention to during the final war. _

_ Uriel sawed again, causing Gabriel to flail against his restraints. Ariel and Michael held him down, pushing his limbs into the unforgiving floor. _

_ "Please…" his voice was giving out. He wasn’t given the mercy of losing consciousness. The blade made its way through the muscle, ripping out a few of his primaries. He let out a pained cry and felt his body tense. The chains tightened against his wings as he struggled, but the two other archangels at his side pushed down harder. _

_ He saw Uriel’s face as she made her way to the other wingtip. She had tears in her eyes and refused to make eye contact. He was just another faceless entity God ordered to be exiled. _

_ The act of cutting off his wingtips was a joke. It was meant to keep him grounded, so he couldn’t escape. But with Michael, Ariel, and Uriel in the room, along with the chains attached to his limbs, there was no way he’d be able to escape. _

_ The second cut was no less painful than the first. It was in a different spot in the muscle, providing an imbalance in the wingspan. It took a while to get through, Uriel performing very rhythmic sawing motions. _

_ Gabriel was sobbing, still struggling against his captors and restraints. “Please! Uriel stop! Please!” He shook and trembled.  _

_ Uriel then had to move to the joints in the bone. It was protocol, though never before had to be done. Her grasp was not gentle as an archangel’s strength should be. It was fierce and restrictive, trying to get the job done as quickly as she could. _

_ When she made the first slash against the heavily-muscled wing, Gabriel screamed again. He balled his hands into fists and tried his best to curl into himself. But Michael and Ariel allowed very little movement, and held his chest right to the ground. _

_ She went through the bone with an unsettling ‘crunch,’ and all present flinched. Gabriel stopped begging and screaming, but his cries heightened when his right wing became lighter. He heard metal on marble as the chain restraining the upper half of his right wing fell. _

_ Images of feathers and blood seared into Gabriel’s eyes. He was horrified when he saw the upper half of his wing fall right in front of his face. That was when he accepted his defeat, and allowed Uriel to continue sawing through his wings. _

_ He was just sobbing, once in a while saying “please” in a hoarse whisper. He was in so much pain, he wished for it to be over soon. All he could hear was ringing in his ears. Whether is was from his screams earlier or a side effect from beginning to become mortal, he would never know. He trembled, but stopped fighting the pairs of hands holding him in place. _

_ He screamed once again when Uriel made her way through the second joint, this time on his left wing. When this one fell, blood splashed on his face. Instead of the pure white blood that was supposed to be coursing through his wings, this blood was pink, and slowly becoming more and more red. _

_ He felt his chest tighten and his throat constrict. Even Uriel looked like she was about to apologize, but swallowed her tongue. He howled when the blade started making its way through his left wing-base. _

_ The fact the blade was dull made it much worse. If he had sharpened it after the first war, maybe Uriel would already be done. No, in order for her to cleanly cut all of his graces off, Uriel had to saw. He imagined it would have been quicker and easier if all she had to do was to swing his sword like a battleaxe, and just chop the wings off. _

_ Uriel was placing all her weight on his back with her knee to allow herself a better position in her motions. This, however, restricted airflow to the lungs Gabriel now found that he needed. He heaved and wept as his comrades betrayed him. _

_ He was tired of yelling by the time Uriel got through his thick stump. He just groaned as he heard a  _ thunk _ along with the chains coming into contact with the floor. _

_ He tried to steady his breathing as the final part of his torture was beginning. His blade, his own sword, was finally cutting through the last bit of his grace. He continued to blubber and sniffle, but the tears dried up a few saws ago.  _

_ He didn’t move when Uriel finished her job. Michael and Ariel stood from their respective sides and began to pick up the room. Uriel went to a table in the corner and began to clean the blade.  _

_ He lamented the loss of his wings. Secretly, he picked up a primary that had fallen near him when the whole fiasco began. It was still pure white, not stained by the scarlet blood speckling everything else in the room. _

_ Gabriel rose to his knees and clutched the feather to his chest. He watched in horror as Ariel simply swept his massive, yet mangled, wings to a single center pile. Treated as if they were just objects, as if he had just walked into a barbershop to get a haircut. And not had the most horrific experience in his lifetime. _

_ Michael held a rag in her hand when she stepped into his view again. She was close, much too close. Gabriel began to back away, leaning and trying to scoot on his knees. But she just grabbed his face by the chin and scrubbed away any blood. He tried to struggle, but it was no use.  _

_ Somehow, Gabriel had managed to hide that primary in his jacket pocket. Glad that human suits had inside pockets, he found some solace in the hope that he’d have some part of Heaven with him on Earth. _

_ Ariel doused what was left of his wings in holy oil, and lit them on fire. Tears found their way back into his eyes as he watched them char and burn. _

_ “Goodbye Gabriel.” Uriel said in a monotone voice. All concern present at the start was hidden away successfully from Gabriel’s knowledge. _

_ “Goodbye…” He rasped, sore throat grating against his words. _

He awoke with a start. Aziraphale was shaking him to awareness, the laptop he was browsing on the table. His heart ached and beat rapidly. 

“Gabriel! Oh dear, Gabriel!” 

Gabe felt a wave of cold wash down him as he became aware of what’s around him. First he had a set of hands on his shoulders, shaking him. Next he recognized the face attached to those arms as an angel. 

He had to get away. Fear gripped his heart as he scrambled backwards. He fell out of the chair he was sitting on, but ignored the shot of pain that went up in his head in favor of getting  _ away. _

Four walls stopped him from getting much further away. Wide eyes regarded the room in front of him. First, it was the angel from before, and a demon ran into the room, yelling. He couldn’t tell who he was yelling at, or what he was saying, but it scared him nonetheless.

-

“Angel!” Crowley saw the angel shaking a clearly distraught Gabriel. Although he would have loved to mess with the ex-archangel, this seemed wrong. Even by a demon’s standards. “He’s having a panic attack!”

Aziraphale stepped back as Gabriel fell onto the ground.

“OH! I’m sorry dear! Oh my word!” he stepped closer, but Gabe just released a whimper and pushed himself further into the corner.

“Step back angel, he might not want to see any angels’ faces for a while,” Crowley placed his hand on his shoulder before stepping to Gabriel.

He crouched down low to the ground and made himself as non-threatening as possible. He inched closer, and Gabriel didn’t seem to have a negative reaction to the demon.

“Hey…” Crowley softly began speaking. “Can I have your hands?” he sat cross legged on the ground and reached his hand out, palm up.

Gabriel was tentative to respond, but eventually reached out one of his hands and placed it into Crowley’s. Crowley gently closed his hand and rubbed circles on Gabriel’s hand.

It took a few minutes, but Gabriel managed to calm down.

His heart was racing, pounding out of his chest. What was that feeling growing in his chest? Oh right, he needs to breathe. That was a thing that… that humans… needed to do. He would have freaked out had he not felt completely worn out.

“There, that’s it.” Crowley whispered. “Let’s get you to bed.”

Gabriel found himself being pulled up to stand, and leaned on the demon. Aziraphale stood in the corner, completely lost for words.

Crowley set the man down onto the bed with a sort of grace uncommon in demons. Gabriel had resigned himself to his fate before their struggle up the stairs. His back ached in pain from the phantom of his blade sawing meticulously. 

Gabriel was tucked in by Crowley, and found himself in a nice pair of pajamas.

“Get some rest,” Crowley reassured Gabriel. “We’ll watch over you, and can talk in the morning.”

I was almost humorous, Gabriel thought. He wasn’t the least bit concerned about his safety right now. He wasn’t even questioning the motives behind the demon’s uncharacteristic actions. Right now, all he wanted to do was sleep. If he passed in the night, he couldn’t bring himself to care.

He was lonely, he came to the conclusion. Aziraphale had Crowley, and Crowley had Aziraphale. They provided comfort and support past the good-natured and friendly way of a simple friendship. Sure, Crowley was nice once in a while. And Aziraphale was objectively worse at comprehending emotions and being supportive.

Before he fully went to sleep, he prayed. He prayed for forgiveness, for safety, and for a companion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so I might have gone overboard with the torture. 1,300 words of putting him through pain. Do I feel any remorse? A little. But... I do have a plan for the future! It is bright!


	8. Ex-Archangel, Cleansed and Fed

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a little domestic scene as an apology for the literal torture of the last chapter

“We have to get him a friend.” Aziraphale said gravely, addressing the elephant in the room. Gabe’s snores could be heard from the dining table, where the two supernatural entities are seated with their pet snake. Pete wound himself around Aziraphale’s arms, preferring the heat the angel radiated to the cold-bloodedness of Crowley.

“Why? He’s never had one before, and he’s fine now.” Crowley scrunched his face, as if he had just eaten a lemon. “Even  _ I _ wouldn’t subject someone to that kind of torture.”

“Oh do stop being so overdramatic,” he shifted his gaze to the bedroom door. “He is not  _ fine _ , Crowley. I can sense sadness, you know.”

Crowley sighed. “Okay, okay. What should we do?  _ Miracle _ up a nice partner for him?”

“We both know it doesn’t quite work like that, dear.”

“It was sarcasm, Aziraphale.” He really did have to teach his angel modern slang soon, or else he’d stand out in a sea of people. “What should we do?”

“I don’t know, what can we do?” he replied. Silence fell when the question was asked. Aziraphale was suddenly very interested in his cup of tea, while Crowley found a spot on his neck that needed rubbing. 

Gabriel walked out of his room looking haggard and forlorn. The bags under his eyes cut into pale, clammy skin. His hair was messy and rumpled, sticking up in all directions. His pajamas were wrinkled, and smelled, as they had forgotten to wash them for the past few days. In fact, Gabriel himself stank of body odor, something he had gone nose-blind to as the days progressed.

Oh! Humans had to bathe on a regular basis! The angel and demon realized at the same moment that they had to teach Gabe how to shower. This’ll be fun. It was a nightmare showing him how humans… uhh… got rid of solid waste. His face was red for the hour following the whole fiasco, refusing to speak in favor of zoning off into a singular direction.

“Phew! Smells like something died over there!” Ahh, Crowley was always predictably dramatic.

Gabe’s glare would have stopped the demon from further commenting, if he hadn’t failed to hide how absolutely exhausted he was. Okay, so maybe he did notice the stench emitting from his armpits. What was he to do though? Humans naturally stank, it’s part of what made them gross.

“Let’s get you to shower,” Aziraphale stood and led Gabriel to the bathroom and began to run the water. “Take off your clothes.”

Gabriel looked at the open door, of which Crowley was staring through. He felt his cheeks warm up as he returned his attention to the angel. Aziraphale just raised an eyebrow seemingly uncaring about Gabe’s internal crisis. He was an angel, and did not have a care in the universe about trivial things like personal modesty or privacy. That time was in the past though. 

Aziraphale had been on this planet for 6,000 years, right? He had been in Eden when humans were created, so he had seen human genitalia before. It wouldn’t be anything new to him. Then there was this urge in the back of his mind telling him to protect his modesty! It was undignifying to be completely naked in front of anyone! It left him vulnerable, especially to the taunts Crowley might shout his way.

Aziraphale shut the door after he realized that it was a part of the problem. Gabriel bounced back and forth on the balls of his heels, refusing to look at the angel.

“Right, so the shampoo and conditioner are on the ledge by the faucet. Just put some in your hair after you get it wet and scrub it in. After you’re all bubbly up there, rinse it out in a way similar to how you put it in. People generally put shampoo in first, then conditioner, but it really doesn’t matter.” Aziraphale set the bottles down by the faucet (when did he get those?)

“Okay…” Gabriel catalogued that information away, fit snug into his brain in the section he’s started to call ‘weird mortal traditions.’ In that folder of his brain, there was also things about handshakes, hair dye, and jousting. He was kinda disappointed to learn that the latter was out of practice, but was distracted by some very nice looking armour.

“Here is some soap for your body. This is called a loofah, and you put the soap on it and use it to wash yourself.” Aziraphale was holding up the items pointedly, putting emphasis on which was which. “I’ll leave a towel on bar, and a change of clothes on the lid of the toilet.”

And with that, Gabriel watched the door close once again, leaving him alone in the bathroom. He just stood, staring at the running water coming out of the showerhead. After a few moments, he started to undress himself and discard his pajamas on the floor.

The water was a perfect temperature. He pulled the shower curtain closed after he stepped into the tub fully. Even though he knew the curtain provided no more privacy than the closed door did, it still felt like the right thing to do.

Oh!  _ Oh! _ Rubbing shampoo into his scalp felt rather nice. His blunted nails traced circles in places that he didn’t even know needed extra attention. His eyes closed and just allowed himself this little indulgence. Rinsing his hair was equally as satisfying, if not more. The warm water did wonders on his tight muscles.

He moved right on to the conditioner, and repeated the process. This time, he almost fell asleep just rubbing the conditioner out of his hair. He managed to realize what was going on, and shook himself right out of it.

“Almost forgot!” Aziraphale burst through the door.

“Aziraphale!” Gabe yelled, holding the curtain so that it was completely covering himself.

“Sorry! Here’s something for your face though. It’s a kind of scrub, so don’t go too rough when you’re washing with it,” he snuck an arm through a side of the curtain holding a small tube. The angel made very certain that he did not see anything that Gabriel did not want him to see. Gabriel took the tube from the offering hand and set it down on the ledge.

“Right then, just take your time!” Aziraphale said after a few seconds then passed. He heard a door open and close once again, and he was alone. He figured to wash his body first, then move to his face. He lathered up the loofah with the soap he was given.

In this time, he truly took his time to get used to his body. Before he had just ignored the gnawing thought that he truly wasn’t familiar with his body. This gave him a chance to see what God had blessed him with.

His arms were decently toned, as were his legs. Looks like those runs he’d go on as an angel actually did some amount of good on his human form. His chest and abdomen were also not bad, more wide than anything else. He very much did  _ not _ want to look between his legs, but a few glances as he washed occured. 

He decided to try to explore his own back as he rinsed it. Gabriel felt scars where his wings should have been, but otherwise was smooth. From what he could tell, the scars ran far down his back. Starting at the area above his shoulder blades, running down to above his hip bone.

_ Nope. Do not think about that Gabriel. _ He chided himself as he finished rinsing off the soap he’d scrubbed onto his body. It was difficult to wash his face, as every part of him told him that his eyes did not belong under running water.

Eventually he was done, and stepped out of the shower. It was not difficult to figure out how to turn the water off, as it was just a turn of the handle. He grabbed the towel, and was relieved to find that it had been kept warm. It was as if he was being swaddled in sunshine. 

Gabriel had to get dressed eventually though, and regretted every second that he was not in the towel. He got over it when he stepped out of the bathroom. Pete had been put back into his enclosure and Aziraphale was making breakfast.

“Morning Gabriel!” the angel shouted over his shoulder as he flipped a pancake. A very fluffy, golden brown, and warm looking pancake.

“Good morning. What’s this?” Gabriel stepped closer to see the counter completely covered in batter and milk.

“It’s breakfast! Apparently, it’s an American delicacy!” Aziraphale threw the pancake onto a plate, the stack becoming dangerously tall. “Take a seat, they’re almost done.”

Gabriel complied, taking a plate and fork with him. Milk and glasses were already on the table, and next to them was a bottle of syrup. Gabriel pulled his phone out of his pocket and began to look into American culture again.

He was in the middle of reading the rules of baseball when Aziraphale joined him at the table with his plate of pancakes.

“Crowley and I figured that learning about American culture was important for you, since we saw what you were looking up on the laptop last night.” Gabriel shuddered. He’d rather forget last night happened, thanks. “Of course, pancakes are different in other cultures. English ones aren’t as fluffy, and in France they’re called crepes!” Gabriel noticed the way Aziraphale’s eyes lit up when he was talking about food.

“These are American, then?” Gabriel figured as much, but wanted to make sure.

“Yes, they are! I had to look up special recipes online, but I managed to find one that promised to be tasty!”

Without further ado, Gabriel put a few on his plate, and began to eat. He saw Aziraphale put some syrup on his, so he followed in suit. Yeah, putting syrup on them made them taste much better, and not as dry. He found himself glad for the glass of milk that was prepared, as he had downed it in a few minutes.

“These are good,” Gabe said around a mouthful of pancakes. 

“Oh, thank you! I am glad you enjoy them.”

“You said you and Crowley saw my interest in America?”

Aziraphale nodded, having put a bite of pancake into his mouth.

“So you’ll help me learn about it?”

“Of course, dear. It’s in my nature to help, is it not?”


	9. Clothes Shopping and How Not to Watch After a Demon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for the late update, i had a completely different plan for this chapter, but then realized it made no sense whatsoever. so here i have this somewhat filler chapter while i finally decide on his hobbies

Crowley returned a few hours later, mumbling something about ‘keeping those plants in line.’ Gabriel honestly couldn’t bring himself to care. He was too busy fretting about the amount of syrup he’d gotten on his clothes.

“I don’t think there was even this much syrup in the bottle!” he was licking his hands clean and trying to ignore the itch in his elbow.

“You’ll just have to be more careful next time,” Aziraphale wiped his mouth down with a single napkin out of politeness, not necessity. His two pancakes were eloquently savored, each taste bud gleeful at the new taste and texture.

Gabriel’s nine pancakes went down much faster than he’d care to admit. After about the fifth one, he was starting to get sick of them. The only reason he continued was sheer willpower and determination alone. 

If Crowley felt Aziraphale perform a miracle to get rid of the oncoming stomach-ache, he did not mention it.

“What do humans do when their clothes get dirty?” Gabe questioned, holding his simple t-shirt out for inspection.

“Well, they usually wash them.”

“So I have to bathe  _ again? _ ”

Crowley snorted into his glass of morning wine (hey, it’s five o’ clock somewhere, right?) Aziraphale did not outwardly react.

“No, well, you should at least wash your face and arms. Normally people have more than one set of clothes, and wash them in separate machines on a regular basis,” Aziraphale was acting as if he were lecturing a whole class on the importance of the  _ Divine Comedy _ in modern day European literature. Not at all like he was teaching a fully grown man what to do with dirty clothes.

“Where do they get more clothes?” Oh, the innocence of newly-human, ex-archangels. It would almost be endearing if he wasn’t sucking on the bottom of his shirt to get syrup out.

That’s when Crowley saw it. He’d know that face anywhere. It was Aziraphale’s  _ I have an idea and I know exactly how I’m going to get Crowley to play along  _ face. 

Aziraphale absolutely  _ had _ to know that he was playing Crowley with the grace of a harpist sitting outside of Heaven’s (metaphorical) pearly white gates, right? He’d say that he hated seeing his angel smiling at him the way that he was. Except for the fact that he’d be lying.

Doing favors for Aziraphale meant spending time with Aziraphale, which meant late-night conversations with Aziraphale. It could also lead to some very passionate displays of affection between the two. Or it could bring that light in Aziraphale’s eyes out. It was never truly gone from what Crowley could tell. It was as if Aziraphale’s eyes reflected the moonlight, and a supermoon formed whenever Crowley did a favor.

Aziraphale knew that Crowley would move the stars for him (but he doesn’t know how literal that statement actually means in this context.) He wasn’t afraid to ask things from Crowley. As an angel, he could recognize love for what it is. If Crowley showed his love as acts of service, then he’d create as many opportunities for him to display that as he saw fit.

“They usually go shopping…” Aziraphale looked Crowley in the eyes, completely surpassing the shades on his nose.

“Ughhhhh! Fine! I’ll be in the Bentley!” Crowley shook his head and made a scene about the whole thing. Once his back was turned, he grinned. Maybe a little skip in his steps slipped into his serpent-like saunter. But really, who cares? He’s making  _ his _ angel,  _ his _ Aziraphale, happy. 

Before Gabriel made his way downstairs, he looked for his jacket from a few nights ago. He found it hanging up in his closet next to his button-up shirt, his pajamas (now smelling very clean), and his pair of trousers. Pants. Americans call them pants.

He dug into the side pocket and sure enough, his feather was in there. He looked at it resting in his hand with a smile on his face and tears in his eyes. It was set down on his bedside table, right in reach should he need it for whatever reason.

Eventually, the three made it to the clothing store. Crowley did not feel any remorse for driving as fast as he did. Gabriel held onto his seat and door with white knuckles and the fear of God in his eyes. He prayed for mercy, and was eventually granted such reprieve.

The store was a lot to begin with. Huge colorful signs hung from ceilings declaring “SALE!” in nearly every department. The unnaturally bright lights bore into his eyes, and the white linoleum floors reflected the rays right back into his eyes. The entire building was windowless, with the exception of the glass doors at the front.

It was almost overwhelming. Music was playing from all corners of the store, effectively distracting him. Aziraphale gave him a quick rundown on what he was to do. A quick size estimate, a reassurance that money really didn’t matter, and if he was to talk to anyone, he had a memory loss problem after a minor car accident.

Okay. This was fine. He was alone in the men’s clothing section with strangers oftentimes brushing up against him. Every time someone would, he’d tense and move quickly away.

He did enjoy looking for shirts to wear though. He stuck to grays and pastel colors, and quickly found his arms full of heavy sweaters.

Crowley and Aziraphale returned after about a half hour. Well, a more accurate description of what Gabe saw would be Aziraphale running after Crowley who was riding on a shopping cart. People darted out of the way of the demon, mothers pulling their children out of the aisles so that they don’t get crushed. The squeaky cart wheels wailed as Crowley took a 90 degree turn around a shelf of graphic tees. Gabe winced as the high-pitched noise hit his ears. 

Aziraphale threw himself in front of the moving cart, and stopped the speeding demon from crashing into the ex-archangel. Crowley was laughing maniacally as Aziraphale glared at him breathlessly. Gabriel had no idea how to react, so he just put his shirts into the basket of the cart.

“I’ve got some trousers- excuse me,  _ pants, _ for you to try on as well,” Aziraphale motioned to the few folded pairs in the basket already. He was breathing heavily, especially for an angel who should be able to perform many strenuous tasks on Earth without even needing to  _ breathe. _

He also decided to ignore the stares of people who had to dodge the speeding demon. Even if it irked him in some odd corner he didn’t know existed that Crowley made such a scene and managed to include him, the  _ <strike>archangel</strike> _ _ human Gabriel _ in it.

Gabriel found where he was to try the clothes on. By now, he was an expert at getting himself dressed. It wouldn’t be a lie to say that he’d felt some pride in this fact, but he’d never gloat about it. Well, at least not to Aziraphale or Crowley. If one of his other siblings decided to visit…

In all honesty, he had no idea if he even wanted to see his siblings as a human. Sure they were all created by God with the intent on making them all Her children, but as Gabriel is getting accustomed to Earth, he noticed how different the humans interacted. They tended to look out for each other and defend each other. The last time anyone needed defending, it was him doing the violating. 

Also, wasn’t it his siblings that stripped him of his Grace? Gabe didn’t know if he could handle facing Michael ever again.

He stepped out of the changing room in a very soft sweater and a pair of jeans. The sizes Aziraphale had guessed were correct, and Gabe was thankful for that. It was weird getting undressed in such a small space, especially since there was a child crying a few doors down. He found that he liked the outfit very much. The sweater was a soft lilac color and felt like cashmere, fingers gliding down the fibers of the front. The pants might not have been as soft but they fit him in just the right spots so that he didn’t feel trapped. If anything, he’d be willing to bet that the material would protect his legs from scratches should he fall.

He struck a few poses (as he had seen others do) and made sure that it looked decent from his backside too. Gabriel didn’t know what he was looking for, but figured if anything was off, Aziraphale would tell him.

Ah, speak of the angel. Aziraphale rounded the corner and met Gabriel’s eyes. He gave the ez-archangel a quick once-over and nodded.

“Looks splendid! Let’s grab a few more articles and go shop some more!”

“Alright, can I keep this on, or do I have to wear my other clothes again?” Gabriel asked, already fond of the sweater.

“I suppose you don’t have to change, we just have to make sure to scan the tags while we pay.”

Gabriel grinned and collected his belongings from the dressing room. When he met with Crowley again, the basket was nearly full. It looked like a fruitcake of clothing, if Gabriel knew what a fruitcake was. Crowley was looking at a rack of leather jackets, no doubt searching for his next outfit centerpiece.

They paid and left the store with armfulls of bags. Aziraphale insisted on taking most of the bags from Gabe, telling him that as an angel he could handle carrying more than a human. From there, Crowley stole the bags from Aziraphale.

“What kind of a boyfriend would I be if I let my partner carry the bags?” he’d said with a sloppy grin dangling on his face.

“Ooh! Let’s get some crafts! Maybe we can even try to find some hobbies for Gabriel,” Again, with them talking as if he wasn’t even there. Honestly though, he was getting rather bored around the bookstore.

  
Okay, he could deal with taking up a hobby. As he passed storefront after storefront though, he couldn’t help but wonder where to even  _ start _ .


	10. In Which I Finally Give our Favorite Ex-Archangel (that isn't Crowley) a Hobby and maybe a Friend while I'm at it

So, he might have been feeling a little overwhelmed. A little was an understatement. Gabe was stationed in front of a wall of musical instruments he was told were called  _ guitars _ . The brightly colored instruments caught his attention from where they were displayed in the window. His feet just walked in the store of their own accord, seemingly with a mind of their own.

“Figured you’d go towards music, being the messenger and all.” Crowley still had his hands full of bags from the clothes store. 

“Where do I start?” he wanted to learn the ins and outs of this instrument. The shape of most of them were smooth and graceful, with vibrant colors popping out of the wood grains and under the finish.

“Well, first we find a guitar for you. Then, you learn to play it.” Aziraphale said, causing Gabriel and Crowley to spin to face the angel, who was holding a gorgeous looking guitar. It was mostly white, with light blue accents on the sharp edges. 

Gabe looked around the store for a few minutes, completely lost as to what to look for. He supposed anything that caught his eye would be fine, right?

“Hi! Is there anything I can help you with?” a nice woman walked up to Gabriel, who was staring at a wall of colorful instruments.

“I’m looking to purchase a…” Aziraphale leaned into Gabe’s ears and reminded him “guitar!” 

“Sure! Do you have any in mind?”

“I’m… I really don’t know what I’m looking for, to be honest.” Gabriel admitted.

“Okay, well how long have you been playing? What kind of music do you like?” the woman asked.

Aziraphale and Crowley walked away, the traitors.

“I don’t, at least, not yet. I do like Queen, though.”

The woman, Amy, as the name tag said, turned to the wall. “Hmm, okay. So most guitars are good for beginners, it’s hard to get a bad one to learn on. And for every new guitar purchase, I am qualified to offer beginners four weeks of lessons, once a week. But I want to find one that’s right for you. Do you prefer acoustic or electric?”

Okay. So he’d get some lessons on how to play if he bought a guitar here. That’s nice, but it meant nothing if he had no clue what she was talking about.

“What would you recommend?” Nice deflection.

She took the bait. “For a new learner, I’d say an acoustic would be best. It’s a lot less setup and much less expensive. Plus, you get a good tone out of most acoustic guitars.”

Amy began walking to a closed off room, gesturing for Gabe to follow her. She opened the door and held it as Gabe walked through. She closed it right behind him, and he glanced through the glass panes to see Aziraphale and Crowley whispering and pointing at him.

In the room were many guitars. At least ten, if he had to say so himself. The room was slightly colder than the rest of the store, and he suppressed a shiver. Amy continued into the room and faced a wall. She seemed to contemplate for a moment before taking a guitar down and handing it to Gabe.

“Give this one a try,” she smiled as Gabe stood there awkwardly holding the guitar.

“Uhhh, okay?” her instructions were totally unclear, so he examined the instrument. He noted six strings, and there were bars running across the long part of it. He held it with one hand by the top, letting his thumb and forefinger cradle the wider part of the long piece. (If he were to know anything about what he was talking about, he’d say he was holding it by the head and neck, near the nut. Alas, he did not.)

Using his other hand, he plucked a string. Amy giggled. “You’re funny! Here, lemme show you a few chords.” she reached around and grabbed a random guitar off the wall. They both made their way towards some chairs, two conveniently facing each other. Gabe sat down after her, noting the way she held the instrument in her lap.

“Give this one a try,” Amy instructed, holding her fingers on the long piece and between the bars. His attempt was valiant, she’d give him that. But when he ran his other hand down the strings as she had done, they both winced. “Let me help…”

She leaned forward and moved Gabe’s fingers for him into the correct place. “I never caught your name.” She looked up at him, moving his whole hand down to the correct place.

His throat was dry. “Gabriel,” he rasped. Her hand were so  _ warm! _ Did everyone’s hands feel like this? He yearned to grasp her hand and seek her warmth.

“Oh, like the angel?” she leaned back and strummed her instrument softly.

“Archangel, yeah.” he took it as his cue to play, and it actually didn’t sound that bad. It wasn’t as clean as hers sounded, but he supposed that if he put enough time into it, he’d get there.

They talked as Gabe learned a few chords. His teacher called them things like ‘A minor’ or ‘D’ or other things like that. He learned a lot about Amy in the time it took him to mirror her fingers. She was from America, and the state of Minnesota. She came to the UK with her college’s study program, allowing her to learn marketing from the masters. After she graduated, she decided to stay and open up a guitar shop.

Gabriel didn’t have much to offer in this conversation. He was interested enough in learning about Amy, so it was just played off as being polite. A knocking at the glass door startled them both, and Gabe saw Crowley pointing at his wrist with Aziraphale scolding him.

“Looks like your friends are getting impatient, I think I’ve kept you long enough. Are you interested in taking that beauty home?” Crowley sauntered in as Amy asked.

“Yes, now let’s go.”

“Dear, there is no rush!”

“Yes there is, now we have to go!”

Amy began packing the guitar from Gabe’s hands into a large case and carried it to the front counter.

“We have all the time in the world, Crowley. Let Gabriel make a friend if he wants!”

“We do not have all the time in the world, my begonias needed watering an hour ago!”

Amy snorted, but covered it up as a cough. “That’ll be 315.70 please.” Gabriel went pale. He didn’t know much about money, but that number was pretty high, and the only notes he was given had twenties on them.

“I’ll cover it.” Crowley stepped forward before Aziraphale was able to offer. They all missed the little smile on the angel’s face when he did so.

She swiped the card given before returning it to the demon with a receipt. “I can offer you a few lessons if you like?”

There was no use in trying to suppress his grin. “I’d like that very much.”

He took the surprisingly heavy case with one hand, and grabbed the small paper bag offered to him. She had thrown in a few things without charging them. Amy called them things like a ‘pick’ and ‘capo’ and ‘tuner’. Using two fingers on the hand holding the bag, he accepted the card held out to him.

“Thank you miss.” Aziraphale said warmly before escorting the pair out of the store.

Gabe crane-necked to say his farewell, but managed to get it in before he was shoved out the door.

He was smiling the whole walk to the car. His arms swung to the side, guitar banging on his leg. He didn’t fuss when he was shoved into the backseat again, or when Crowley began to drive erratically. For the first time on Earth, in his mortal life, he felt truly happy.

The memory of Amy’s warm touch replayed in his mind. She was soft and gentle, despite the rough calluses on her fingers that would suggest otherwise. There was something to be said about being tough and soft at the same time.

He looked at Aziraphale sitting in the passenger seat. He was grinning at Crowley completely unashamed. When he really thought about it, there was a time when Gabe had used soft as an insult towards the angel. In Heaven, there was no place for softness. It hadn’t occurred to him until just now that you could be both soft  _ and  _ tough.

The Principality, Guardian of the Eastern Gate, surrounded himself in softness. It was in the jumpers, the sofas, the worn books pages, and the hot cocoa.

He could also kill Gabriel without even lifting a finger.

Oh, so that’s why the virgin Mary started screaming when he came to deliver the good news.

He tried to put away the thought. Being fearful of angels used to be unthinkable. They were to do as God ordered, and there was no questioning Her. It was Heaven’s assumption that humans were going to follow suit, and if they were deemed unworthy, then they just had to live with it.

But now he was at the receiving end. It was Gabriel that had his wings torn off by his kin. Now he understood the pit in his stomach when he was reminded of Heaven. It was more than homesickness, as he had found in research. It was  _ terror. _

Aziraphale looked into Crowley’s eyes, removing the ridiculous sunglasses and throwing them into the glove compartment. He beamed and laughed as Crowley grumbled. The demon really wasn’t upset though. Gabe could tell by the sparkle in his face as Aziraphale praised the demon for his eyes.

Really, if Gabriel had to learn something today, he supposed it would be this.

Being soft isn’t a bad thing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> very much overdue, i apologize. also can i just say that amy is not a mary sue? thanks
> 
> oh and dont worry theres more hobbies for this guy than just guitars


	11. You Can't Appreciate The Ups Without The Downs, But Right Now, Gabriel Seems To Be Having A Lot More Downs Than Ups

Heaven was different without Gabriel around. Sandalphon earned Gabriel’s old position and promptly began to make Gabe’s office space his own. This included leaving feathers in whatever space he could spare, under chairs, in corners, inside throw pillows, ect. This way, everyone would know the space would be occupied by Sandalphon and to be warned.

In a weird sort of way, it was similar to how dogs pee on things to claim them as their own. Except this is not as disgusting, and more of a general warning to invading forces.

After filing some papers about a minor miracle, he was granted some time to meditate. He let his mind wander, beginning with praise to the Almighty. He thanked her for the position through prayer. Eventually, his thoughts turned to be about Gabriel.

How was he doing? If he discorporated (died, his mind reminded him, mortals don’t get another chance,) surely they’d cross paths, right?

Then again, neither of them made a habit out of strolling through the seas of saved souls. It was difficult for deceased souls to meet with an angel to begin with. Many are happy to meet the Son and be done with it. But if someone  _ did _ want to meet an angel, it was a lot of work to get to one. To be honest, Sandalphon didn’t remember what it entailed.

He’d talk to Michael about visiting Gabriel. There was nothing but hope in his eyes as he set off to find his sister.

.-.. .. ..-. . .----. ... / .--- ..- ... - / .- / --. .- -- . / ..- -. - .. .-.. / - .... . / --. .- -- . / ... - --- .--. ... / -... . .. -. .----. / ..-. ..- -.

Gabriel sat cross legged on his bed, cradling his guitar between calves and struggled to make the chords Amy had shown him. Crowley had given him a ‘hard time’ about finding a ‘girlfriend,’ whatever that means. Amy made him happy, and her face lit up when talking about her passions. Which was guitars and her birthplace. Gabe learned more about the American Midwest in his brief meeting with Amy than any amount of research the laptop could provide.

He was reminded of the business card in his back pocket, and rested his guitar on his bed. Aziraphale had cheerfully programmed Amy’s number into Gabriel’s phone for him after they settled back into the shop.

Gabe decided he’d try to text her.

  
  


_ Hello _

_ uhhh, hi? whos this _

_ This is Gabriel _

_ oh yeah! sorry lol  _

_ what’s up? _

  
  


Gabriel looked upward after quickly googling what ‘lol’ meant.

  
  


_ The ceiling _

_ duh, i mean what are you doing _

_ Texting you, what are you doing? _

_ the same ig _

_ i got home an hour ago and was about  _

_ to make dinner _

  
  


Now that Amy had mentioned it, Gabe was beginning to feel hungry once again. Being human was annoying. 

  
  


_ what are you doing tonight? _

The implications of that text were completely lost on our former Archangel. He was forced to relive Aziraphale’s instructions as he and Crowley departed for a fancy dinner. Gabe was to cook on his own, and make dinner for himself. The angel promised him that nothing would burn, but should an accident happen, text Crowley as soon as he could.

_ I have to cook dinner, but I don’t _

_ know what I want to make. _

_ Or how to cook. _

_ then just order in _

_ What? _

_ order in? you know, when you get food _

_ delivered to your house _

_ i know this really good place around _

_ london, let me find you a link _

Gabriel was already familiar enough with links, especially after having to google a lot of Amy’s acronyms to fully understand what she’s saying. He has a lot of linguistics to catch up on, that’s for sure.

The notification to the link went unread for a few minutes, as did the follow up when he didn’t answer a full minute after she sent it. Amy didn’t think much of it, chalking it up to him ordering from another place.

There were footsteps downstairs. Not unusual, except for the fact that the shop was closed and the owners of said shop had left not even a half hour ago.

His heart thrummed in his chest, but rose to his feet slowly. A short little scuffle, as if someone had tripped on the rug in the living room but regained their balance before falling.

Gabe stepped out of his room and saw Pete glaring at the door downstairs hissing.

Something dropped in his stomach and blood ran cold when heavy footsteps began making their way towards them.

The first thing he did was take Pete out of his enclosure. Some irrational part in his mind said it was to give the ball python a chance to live. Maybe that was the case, but there was no time to stew on it now. The doorknob turned, but couldn’t find anything he could use as a weapon. He now despised when Aziraphale had made a remark a while back.  _ “Books are the best weapon in the world!”  _ What was Gabe to do, chuck tomes at the intruder’s head until they collapsed?

The door swung open, and Sandalphon was already grinning from ear to ear.

“Gabriel! Glad to see you’re not dead yet!”

Pete, who had already wrapped himself around Gabe’s neck, started hissing even more dramatically and raised his head. This would prove to not be a bother, as Gabe had stopped breathing the second he saw the angel’s face. 

His heart beat wildly in his chest and his hands shook. Sandalphon never dropped his smile as he stepped fully into the room and closed the door behind him.

He had to call Crowley, and fast. He reached his hand to his back pocket as he backed into the wall. It was empty. He left his phone in the room, the room Sandalphon was standing in front of. Gabe left the door to his room open, but as it was right next to the door coming from downstairs, he wasn’t going to risk it.

“Gabriel?” Sandalphon seemed confused. He took a few steps towards Gabe, causing him to dash away to the closest door.

It was the door to the bedroom that Aziraphale and Crowley shared. Meaning it was locked. He grabbed the doorknob with both hands, shaking profusely. He pulled and pushed as his breath came in short gasps. He wasn’t making any progress.

Gabriel noticed how close Sandalphon was getting to him. He grabbed books and began to chuck them towards the intruder. It seemed to do nothing, not even dodging the flying books. Soon the books ran out though, and there was nowhere else for Gabe to go.

It felt as if he was being choked. His knees gave out from under him, forcing him to curl into himself on the ground. Even though he was breathing, no air was getting into his body. Gabe felt the pressure grow in his throat.

He pushed his back into the corner. Pete had made his way down Gabriel and managed to hide behind some shelves. There was a pressure building up behind his eyes and in his throat, which he was too preoccupied to fight.

.-.. .. ..-. . .----. ... / .--- ..- ... - / .- / --. .- -- . / ..- -. - .. .-.. / - .... . / --. .- -- . / ... - --- .--. ... / -... . .. -. .----. / ..-. ..- -.

Sandalphon was given permission to visit Earth on the orders of encouraging a local schoolboy to become a minister.

“It would be rude to not stop by if you’re in the neighborhood,” Saraqael told him with a wink. He’d spread the word of the Lord, and made his way to his former co-worker’s bookshop. No one was there to answer the door so he just appeared inside the backroom. 

He heard something upstairs, sounding like a bell. Sandalphon began to make his way toward the stairs, but almost tripped on an out of place rug. 

But when he finally saw his brother, Gabriel did not have the reaction he expected. 

Something was off about him, Sandalphon noticed. First of all, his clothes were different than what he used to wear. Instead of the light gray sweaters and purple scarves, he had on a pair of jeans and a deep purple t shirt. Then there was the case of his hair. It was unkempt and ruffled, and the hints of a beard about to grow in on his chin.

Oh yeah, and the fact that Gabriel was absolutely  _ terrified _ of him right now.

Material objects were thrown in his direction, but none of them seemed to do any damage. They were more of a nuisance than anything else.

He supposed he needed to show sympathy toward Gabriel. It’s not every millenia that you’re turned mortal, right? First he needed Gabriel to stop sobbing so he could figure out what was wrong!

_ Did he lose his memories? _ Sandalphon thought to himself. He supposed that he hadn’t, as he’d made his way to Aziraphale’s bookshop without any divine help.

“Calm down!” A few steps forward, and Gabriel’s sobs worsened. Gabriel kept his eyes on Sandalphon, but the tears were blocking his sight.

_ “Get out”  _ a voice appeared. Sandalphon reared his head and saw the demon Crowley just a few steps to his side. He looked back at Gabriel, who was being held by Aziraphale.

“GET OUT!” Crowley roared, summoning hellfire into his palms.

Sandalphon decided he wasn’t going to try and test the demon. At the moment, he was the only one in the room who was not immune from holy fire. (Gabriel being the exception, but it acted as regular fire, and did not promise discorporation.)

It was just the three of them in the room now.

Gabe wrapped around Aziraphale and burrowed his face into the angel’s neck. He shook and sobbed, but was slowly able to regain his breath again.

There was only enough room in the particular space for two man-shaped beings to occupy. So Crowley did what he supposed to be the most helpful. He made hot cocoa, by hand. He’d even boiled the milk on the stovetop, and put in fancy chocolates. There was always a stache of mini marshmallows, which he just about emptied into the giant mug.

Gabe noticed that his hair was being played with. Aziraphale was running his fingers up and around his scalp, blunt fingernails scratching at itches he didn’t even know he had.

A warm mug was being pressed into his hands. He looked up into a pair of yellow, empathetic eyes.

“Thank you.” he croaked, throat wrecked and dry. He took a few sips from it, then set the mug down.

There hasn’t been a time in Gabe’s life when he felt this tired. His eyes were dry, despite the rivers that had come out of them not even five minutes ago. He’d just close them, give them a quick rest. After all, it’s not like Aziraphale should mind. He was a Principality, part of his job was to protect and help.

Gabe didn’t stir when he was lifted. He didn’t notice when he’d been placed into his own pajamas. His guitar made its way into his brand new stand, and his phone plugged into the charger. Aziraphale motioned Crowley over to look at his latest notification.

  
  


_ Gabe? _

  
  


Well, at least it wasn’t just the two of them that actually gave a damn about him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a few things, actually. yes, i do read the comments! i actually get a lot of ideas for this story from there! so if you really wanna see something, say something! if i can work it into the plot, i can probably add it!
> 
> also, pete does eventually find his way back to his enclosure, completely unharmed


	12. Crowley Lets Gabriel Rest While Sandalphon and Michael use their Brains for the First Time in Millennia

Sandalphon returned to Heaven with a distressed appearance. His eyebrows were furrowed and was unnaturally quiet. He sat in his newly acquired office, allowing himself the small comfort of resting his back and slouched against the chair. He had paperwork to do. Of course, Sandalphon would also have to file a report about his visit to Earth.

When he’d pictured his reunion with his brother, he expected tears. Humans tended to get emotional and leak, right? He saw it in the rare cases that he dealt with humans, a minor blessing here and there. Sandalphon had taken away enough sickness to see how loved ones react to reunions. (The tuberculosis epidemic had been rough on many, and it required multiple visits to the quarrinteened hospitals for a lot of angels.)

So when books started flying and Gabriel shrank away from him, there was some strange emotions bubbling up inside of him. Many angels don’t allow themselves to feel emotions, but Sandalphon had purposely let his guard down for his brother’s sake. His corporation’s eyes began to feel as if they tickled, some strange pressure pushing outward. There was the weight of a rock sitting in his neck, if he had to breathe he might have choked.

A quick rapt hit the door twice, and Michael let herself in.

“How was he?” She asked sincerely. There was a folder clutched to her chest in one arm, the other moving to close the door behind her.

“I’m not sure,” Sandalphon replied. He sat up straight and bridged his fingers together. Michael sat down in a chair on the other side of the desk.

“What do you mean? Is he okay?”

Sandalphon had not witnessed so much emotion in a while. First with Gabriel and his reaction to his brother. Then with how Aziraphale, his former co-worker, let Gabriel clutch at him and sent daggers to Sandalphon. Pure hatred lived in Crowley’s inflection.

But Michael? She looked worried. Genuinely concerned about how her actions may have affected Gabriel.

“Physically, he was about as healthy as the average mortal. He appeared to have added some weight onto his corporation, which was to be expected. He also seemed to be growing some facial hair as well.”

“What did he have to say?” Michael prodded.

“It was just a lot of screaming and crying, really,” Sandalphon let his fingers collapse onto the desk and slouched further.

“What was the traitor doing to him!?” Ah. That’s why she was known as the warrior. The wrath and fury of God’s graces filled her eyes.

“That’s the problem! They weren’t doing anything! I just walked in and Gabriel went into his fit.”

Silence fell over the two as they mused over the situation. Sandalphon began swinging his chair from side to side and Michael shifted into a more comfortable position on the stiff seat.

“He was almost… what was that word humans use? Adorable! Gabriel was adorable,” remarked Sandalphon. Micheal shot him a cold and calculating look. “He was like the other mortals. His first reaction to a sign of danger was to save the snake Azira-” Sandalphon choked on his former co-worker’s name, “the traitor and his pet demon keep.”

Michael smiled, remembering the accounts of the failed execution. Gabriel held his ground in the face of danger, putting himself in the line of fire to save his siblings.

“We’ll have to find a way to check up on him. Until then, file that report, Sandalphon.”

.-.. .. ..-. . .----. ... / .--- ..- ... - / .- / --. .- -- . / ..- -. - .. .-.. / - .... . / --. .- -- . / ... - --- .--. ... / -... . .. -. .----. / ..-. ..- -.

Gabriel had never slept for more than eight hours at a time. It was like he had some sort of internal clock that woke him up right at the eight hour mark. It never failed.

Until the day after Sandalphon visited.

Gabe was going onto hour eleven, and didn’t seem to be showing any signs of waking. Crowley had taken a perch on the windowsill to watch over the ex-Archangel. He allowed his legs to swing and he gazed into the sky.

The sky was completely gray, some snowflakes hit the window and melted. The local weatherman called for some light snow lasting the next few days. This would prove to be entirely inaccurate, as Crowley purposely messed with the equipment when it was installed.

No, he supposed it was supposed to storm soon.

Crowley turned his attention back to his former brother. Or was he still his brother after the demon fell? He was still made of angelic parts afterall.

No matter the case, Crowley studied Gabe in his sleep. He definitely had his better days, the demon thought. Despite the fact that he was sleeping at the moment, there were bags under his eyes. It wasn’t noticed before, but Gabriel needed to shave as well. 

All that to the side, he looked as vulnerable as he looked peaceful. He’d managed to use an extra pillow to cuddle into. He wrapped his arms around it, holding it firmly to his own chest and curled his body into it. Figures Gabe would be a side-sleeper. The thick comforter encased him and wrapped around his feet.

It was absolutely endearing. Crowley returned to the dark and cloudy sky, but allowed his thoughts to remain on Gabe.

There had been a time when they were equals. There were two ex-Archangels in the room, one watching over the other.

Gabriel had been very powerful and had been at Raphael’s side when helping construct the Universe. Raphael wisped together Alpha Centauri with care and complexity. He’d cradled the twin stars in his hands, making sure that the light and power of God rang through them. 

It wasn’t Raphael that named them. He let God’s new creation do that. Of course, it took a few millennia for them to name the stars, prefering to name the shapes they took. (The stars weren’t made to take shapes, that was a thing humans did and Crowley found to be touching, as a big supporter of using imagination.) He liked the name though. Alpha Centauri and Proxima Centauri laid side-by-side, closest to the sun where God would put her next creation.

Gabriel had built the Pillars of Creation nearby. Well, he made the whole Eagle Nebula, but put his pride into the Pillars. He smeared his metaphysical fingers with the materials God gave him to work with. He was a pre-time Bob Ross. Crowley made a mental note to show his former brother Bob Ross.

But now? Crowley had been an archangel too once, and still reaped the benefits of said glory. For instance, stopping time was not something any other demon could do. Gabe on the other hand, just had a panic attack when Sandalphon paid a visit. Which was understandable given the circumstances, but a huge shock to how Crowley viewed Gabe.

Before, he was viewing Gabe through the eyes of an estranged, long lost family member. Like a cousin you grew up with, but then moved away only to come back a few years later with a neck tattoo and a septum piercing. You still know them as a person, but don’t quite know what happened in those few years. So you have to get ready to adapt to those changes.

Laying curled into his blankets, Gabriel was near powerless. This was an entirely different situation. It was like Crowley had lost a pet and couldn’t find it for a few weeks. Then one day it turned up back on your doorstep, licking its wounds and begging for help.

Oh, Aziraphale was right. He really was a nice person. Crowley didn’t know he missed Gabriel until he saw him on his brief visit up in Heaven. (Although Gabeirl didn’t know it was him, and he still didn’t need to know.) It was awkward, and Gabe put a bad taste in Crowley’s mouth. When he returned, he’d mocked him with Aziraphale.

A sudden gust of wind smacked the window.

Crowley liked humans. They were so inventive and creative, always wanting to learn. When they first figured out to take to the skies, Crowley had been there staring in awe. He brushed shoulders with American revolutionaries Benjamin Franklin, John Adams, and Thomas Jefferson on that day in 1783. (He was always in favor of a revolution, and also tempted Franklin to a night of fun. Jefferson was not as easy, but could be persuaded into courting a girl, which eventually made him break his hand trying to jump over a fence in an attempt to impress her. John Adams was not at all interested in what Crowley had to say. The demon stuck to french, so as to not stick out. But as it turns out, Adams did not know french, which made Crowley question the Continental Congress’s choice in French ambassadors. Finally when he could speak english to the man, he was very much devoted to his wife Abigail, and would not even consider making a living on the back of slaves. It was infuriating as a demon, but as a somewhat decent person a wonderful thought.)

Gabe shuffled a little in his sleep, nuzzling his face deeper into his pillow. Crowley’s eyes softened and leaned his head against the wall and into the sill.

Crowley looked at the phone charging on the nightstand, remembering seeing the notification that Amy had left. He was going to be sure that Gabriel made a friend that wasn’t a 6,000 plus year old supernatural entity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyone notice in the last chapter that sandalphon only considered aziraphale as a coworker compared to how he viewed gabriel as family? that was on purpose. also i am a nerd for american history as an american, and franklin, adams, and jefferson were in fact all present to see the first hot air balloon flight. if you want another show to watch on amazon prime, i highly suggest john adams.
> 
> other than that, the usual apologies for making you wait and encouragement to comment


	13. Gabe Finally Sees Those Puppies I Promised in the Tags

The plan was for Gabe to meet Amy at her house for his first official lesson. She was wary to let a stranger into her house, but she had her roommate and her phone fully charged always in her pocket. 

Her roommate was Lee, and studied to be a veterinarian. This meant that all of their mutual friends turned up at her house with animal problems.

Five minutes before Gabe was supposed to arrive, Amy and Lee had an entire litter of puppies dumped on them. Well, not ‘dumped,’ per say. It was more like the puppy’s mom had a very unfortunate accident, and Lee just so happened to have doggy formula on hand constantly. 

So that’s how Gabe found them when he knocked on the door. Amy yelled “It’s open!” and Gabe let himself in. He set his guitar case down in the entryway and took off his boots (just as he practiced with Crowley, actually untying the laces and everything).

A high pitched whining brought Gabriel to the living room where puppies were being hand fed individually. 

“What- are those?” he asked.

“Hey Gabe! Sorry, this came up last minute. They’re orphaned puppies that were  _ just _ dropped off. Mind giving us a hand for a few extra hours?” Amy asked, holding a baby bottle in one hand and stroking the pup with another.

“Uhh, sure. What can I do?”

Lee answered. “There’s some formula mixed together already on the counter in the kitchen. Bottles are in the cupboard above the sink. Pour some in them and microwave them for thirty seconds. We need four more.”

Gabe went in the direction she was pointing, and sure enough, found himself in a kitchen. Finding the bottles were easy enough, grabbing what looked similar to what was being used in the other room. The microwave was a bit harder to operate, as the bookshop did not have one. After enough button pressing, there were 3 minutes on the digital display. Whatever, he’d just stop it at thirty-second intervals.

He walked back, four warm bottles in his arms.

“Thank God.” Lee took two bottles from his arms, putting the one she had earlier to the side. Amy reached for one and motioned for Gabriel to sit down. He didn’t comment on the statement about is mother, suppressing the thought that She had nothing to do with his microwaving skills.

“Have you ever taken care of puppies?” Amy asked.

“No, just younger siblings,” which wasn’t a lie, but he had much less to do with his sibling’s upbringing than the statement implied.

“Okay, it’s a similar concept. They’ll eat till they’re full, then fall asleep. We just have to make sure that they can eat as much as they want and have somewhere warm to sleep.” Amy explained.

He nodded, and watched as the girls held the bottles out for the animals. How they latched onto the fake teat immediately, and how the milk level began to lower.

Gabe copied what they were doing, finding that a warm feeling dropped in his chest as the puppy closest to him began to eat.

The puppies were all black, and they were smaller than the bottle. Their stubby little legs splayed out at their sides, not yet strong enough to do anything more than crawl. They were about the size of Gabe’s hand.

“They’re so small,” he spoke softly.

“Yeah, poor things. I’d say they’re about a week old,” Lee informed them. “Normally they’d be getting food from mom, but we have to feed ‘em if mom isn’t here to do it.”

“What did they say happened to mom?” Amy asked.

“They weren’t sure.”

Silence fell, save for the whimperings coming from the pups.

They were mostly black, with a few marks of tan here and there. Soft fuzz coated the puppies, and tiny little ear flaps poked out of their heads.

“Their eyes aren’t even open…” he was stroking the puppy with his other hand. 

“They’ll be open by next week.” Lee informed him.

Amy turned a smile toward Gabe, but he was too preoccupied with caring for the puppy nearest to him. She had never seen so much emotion in a man’s face. It was as if the wall most men had built up over the years of growing up, did not even exist within Gabe.

“I’d apologize for having to reschedule the lesson, but you look like you’re having the time of your life,” She commented.

Gabe didn’t know how to respond to that. He was truly glad to be there, to help these two women. He’d helped many people in the few visits to Earth. Miracles healing people from terminal illnesses, or giving them a few extra years with family and loved ones. None of that compared to how it felt to tending to these puppies.

As it turns out though, he didn’t have to respond. A news alert on the TV in the background warned the residents of an oncoming storm.

_ “Travel outside is not advised, as wind conditions set the temperature at approximately -34 degrees celsius. Expect a half meter of snow overnight,”  _ the weatherman said in his most serious voice.

“Looks like you’re staying here,” Amy told Gabe, earning a soft look from Lee between the two.

“Thank you, but I’m sure Crowley can make the drive here-”

“No way. Half a meter is more than one and a half feet. That overnight is a blizzard, no one can drive through that. I don’t know how much snow your part of the midwest got, but in Minnesota, we know snow.” The puppy she had been feeding fell asleep before he finished his second bottle. She set it next to Gabe, whose puppy was still working on her first.

Gabe went to argue, but was cut off by Lee. “I wouldn’t argue there buddy,” she started, “once she sets her mind to something, she’s as stubborn as a mule.”

Amy stuck her tongue out at her roomate. “Thanks for that,  _ Lee, _ ” she was being sarcastic! Gabe had yet to fully learn sarcasm, so maybe he could learn from her. “Tell your ride to stay home and stay safe, we can take care of ya.”

Gabe used his ‘free’ hand to pull out his phone and text Crowley with his thumb. It was slow, and the puppy whined at the loss of pets.

  
  


_ Amy says to stay home and to stay safe, no one can drive through a blizzard _

  
  


“Aww, look at this!” Aziraphale glanced over Crowley’s shoulder to his phone screen.

“His first sleepover! Oh I do hope they have an extra toothbrush, we both know how ornery he gets when his teeth are dirty.”

Crowley threw his head back to look at Aziraphale. “Wouldn’t it just be a miracle if they found a spare one in a bathroom drawer?”

Aziraphale smiled. “I love you,”

“Love you too, Angel.”

  
  


_ ok _

  
  


Gabe’s phone buzzed, but he was putting the mostly empty bottle down as his puppy fell asleep. 

Actually, all of the puppies quieted slowly. It took a few minutes before they all fell asleep, but when they did, Lee moved them to all be in one pile.

Amy turned a wild eye to Gabe.

“Now let’s get this party started!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so so so so so sorry for the late chapter! i had an idea on what i wanted to do with it, but then the plot left me about half way through.
> 
> i have written down what i want the next chapter to be have, but i'm always open to suggestions!
> 
> also i noticed that there's no real plot going on here, so i have to start doing that too


	14. Gabe watches LOTR with his first real friend and her roommate while he guards a puppy with his life

“That’s a C, not a G,” Amy reminded him, moving his finger to the correct string.

“Why do I even need to know this?” Gabe was beginning to get frustrated. She insisted that he learned the ‘natural scale’ and that he’d need it later if he was going to be more than a beginner player.

“You’ll need it if you ever want to read sheet music. Sometimes all you’ll be able to find is sheet music for a song, no tabs.”

“Tabs?”

She sighed. “It’s a really easy way to learn how to play a song.”

“Great! Let me see some of these tabs!”

She pulled her phone out of her pocket and typed some words into a chrome search bar. Amy then set her phone to rest on the guitar so that Gabe could read it. There were six lines and numbers working their way down the lines.

“The line at the top is your high e string, the bottom is your low E string. The numbers are what fret to put your finger,” She pointed at the corresponding strings. “Just… don’t become too reliant on tabs. When I was first learning that’s all I used. It made it super hard to learn actual techniques.”

Gabe noted the seriousness in her tone. And, he was the student after all. “Okay. What’s this then?”

“That’s the song from the Lord of the Rings soundtrack.”

“Never heard of it.”

“WHAT? You’ve never heard of Lord of the Rings?”

“... no?” he responded.

“LEE! We’re gonna watch Rings! You up for a marathon?” Amy shouted behind her to the kitchen.

“I’ll make popcorn!” she responded.

That’s how Gabriel found himself sitting on the comfortable couch in front of a generously sized tv. He was put in charge of holding the popcorn bowl. He and Amy were on the couch, and Lee was tending to the puppies they moved to the living room. They didn’t require much, just a steady hand for comfort.

By the middle of the first movie, he grew a distaste for popcorn. The way it stuck in between his teeth disgusted him and he found himself attempting to pick it out with his tongue. He eventually had to pick it out with his nails. Gross.

By the end of the first movie, the outside had turned unnaturally dark. The snow was falling quickly and heavily. It blanketed the window sill and the lawn it opened up to. 

As the credits rolled, Gabe stretched his arms. He found it somewhat difficult to follow the plot of the movie, but he enjoyed analyzing the fighting tactics they’d used. The Orcs reminded him of a certain infernal force.

“I’ll make hot dish…” Amy stood after Gabe, heading to the kitchen and putting her hair up. 

“Hot dish?” Lee asked her roommate.

“Oh, yeah. I forgot you British are uncultured in terms of cuisine. It’s called casserole everywhere else, but they’re wrong.” Her tone was playful, not at all meaning the insult that rested in the words.

Then it was just Gabe, Lee, and the puppies.

“So, how’d you two meet?” She struggled with coming up with conversations.

“Uhh, her instrument shop.”

“Oh, you mean her guitar store?”

“Yeah.”

She smiled at him. “I’m glad she found someone decent. She hasn’t stopped talking about you, you know.”

No. He didn't know that. He was spared from responding by a whine.

“Hey there, little guy.” She cooed at the pupper. “What’s the matter?”

“You know he can’t answer, right?” it took a while for Gabe to get used to the fact that animals no longer understood him. It was a hard lesson to learn, but he did eventually. 

“He-” Lee checked real quick. “Actually, she just had a whole bunch of food. There’s no way she’s hungry. _ No there’s not! Do you just want attention? Is that it? _” Her voice turned upward, as if mocking the poor thing.

It kept crying, despite the fact that Lee was basically covering the thing with her hand while stroking it.

Some kind of knot formed in Gabe’s chest. Later, he might lie about why he’d done what he will do next. But right now, in this moment, angel instincts kicked in.

“Can I-” he didn’t know how to ask, but thankfully he didn’t have to finish.

“Yes! Here you go…” as soon as it was transferred into his arms, he felt somehow connected to it.

He laid back, cradling her between his arms and his chest. Her little claws got stuck in the threads of his sweater. She began to quiet down as he used his other hand to stroke her. They sat in quiet for the next few minutes, the only sound being the wind whipping the windows and a rubber spoon scraping the sides of a kettle.

The gas in the stove was turned off, and Amy walked in carrying two bowls.

“Hot dish for Gabe…” she passed the bowl to the former archangel, who rearranged the puppy so that he could rest the bowl on his chest. “And hot dish for me.”

“What about me?”

“You have legs, don’t you?”

Amy’s roomate huffed, but rolled her eyes as she went to get her own bowl.

“This is really good.” Gabe said around a mouthful of the offered meal.

“It’s my dad’s recipe, y’know.” She nudged Gabe’s knee with her own.

“Tell your dad it is splendid!”

She laughed. “I’ll let him know he has another fan.”

When Lee came back into the room, they began the second movie. All three of them ate hot dish and watched the Lord of the Rings, the Two Towers as snow was thrown against the thin windows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yes, it's short. i am sorry. i'm currently in the middle of the next chap and we have some angst and plot up ahead! y'all asked for some beelzebub, and you shall receive!
> 
> also my dad does make some of the best hot dish i've ever had, and no one can even begin to compete with it. sorry, i don't make the rules.
> 
> need dog names! as you can tell from the chapter, gabe's gonna get a puppy. i have a list made up already, but i'm afraid i'm not that great at coming up with dog names.
> 
> extra credit if you submit pics of your own puppers!


	15. Nightmares; Reality or Fantasy?

Beezlebub was furious. After all their effort in training forces for a war, and all their time put into strategizing with their top generals, the war was averted. And getting a group of demons to follow a plan was much more than difficult.

They tried to call Gabriel, so that they wouldn’t at least be suffering alone. Sandalphon was the one to answer the phone, and he refused to transfer them to the correct line.

‘Fine,” they thought to themselves. ‘I’ll find him myself.’

As much as they wanted to, they couldn’t try Heaven first. No way was he in Hell either. So Earth it was.

Despite what anyone would say, the archangel had a distinct aura about him. Traversing across Europe allowed the Prince to find him easily.

It was a complete coincidence that there was a blizzard above that part of the continent. It made their job so much easier. They waited until it was dark, spying on him as he watched a film with two female humans. The group seemed to be enjoying their time together, which confused Beezlebub. 

Gabriel had never shown more than a general interest to humans, but now he was chatting with them?  _ And _ he was consuming their food?

Even further, the demon had never seen Gabriel be as tender as he was being in this moment. He had a baby canine sleeping on his chest, and pure joy lived in his eyes as he spoke to one of the girls specifically.

Eventually though, he fell asleep. Which should have startled Beezlebub, but they just saw it as a chance to talk with him without announcing to the girls that they were here.

_ Gabe was enjoying his time playing his guitar in Amy’s living room. He could hear her in the next room over, probably cooking. His dog was napping on the couch, a bit bigger than the puppies he just met, but seemed to be similar.  _

_ He was strumming C and G chords back to back, humming some melody he’d heard centuries ago.  _

_ He was rudely interrupted by Beelzebub appearing, searing up through the carpeted floor. _

_ “What do you want, demon?” he sneered. _

_ Beelzebub snorted. They orbited the former archangel in a disgusting curiosity. _

_ “What happened to you, oh great Gabriel?” they mocked him. _

_ He stiffened. “None of your business.” _

_ “None of my buzzzinezzz, huh? Izz that even your call to make anymore?” they pushed him to the ground with their foot. _

_ Gabe stayed silent, hoping that he could just glare the demon away. Of course, he still had no practice at glaring so it was entirely ineffective. _

_ “Where’zz your wingzz, angel?” they were mockingly sweet, something that sent daggers into Gabriel’s stomach. _

_ Flies erupted out of their mouth and encased Gabe. He yelled and tried to bat them away, but every movement just made it worse. _

_ It was that day again, his last one in Heaven. He could feel the tears being made all over again. The bones popping out of sockets, bloodied feathers surrounding him, and his own anguished cries reverberating throughout the chamber clouded his senses. _

_ This was different though. He could feel Beelzebub’s presence this time. It was a cruel trick for them to play on him, to torture him all over again. _

_ He could feel his own muscles strain against the bindings. Beelzebub was laughing somewhere in the distance. _

_ Then he was back in the living room. Beelzebub still holding his shoulder down with their foot. “Oh, thizz izz too good.” they were laughing. It was a strange look on the demon, but since when had they cared? _

_ “Lookzz like Upstair’zz favorite watchdog’zzz lozzt hizz plazze.” _

_ “Stop! Why are you doing this?” he struggled against their leg. It was an immovable object, and he was no longer the unstoppable force. _

_ They leaned down, letting mirth flow from their face. _

_ “Zzzeee you in Hell.” _

He jumped awake to a dark room. After his eyes adjusted, he took a glance around the room. Snow was still violently hitting the walls of the house, looking to tear it out of it’s foundation. There was a blanket draped on him that was not there before, as well as a pillow under his head.

The TV was off, presumably turned off after it was realized that he had fallen asleep.

He was alone in the room he realized. The thought sent an unwanted shiver down his spine, especially after having a dream like he just had.

Gabe slipped his phone out of his pocket and opened the texting app. There were three names in the contacts list, and he selected Crowley’s name.

  
  


_ Beelzebub is out to get me, just saw them in my dream _

  
  


Crowley rarely got texts. He had about five sitting in his conversation under Aziraphale’s name, all of them having to do with take out. Then there was Adam, who was determined to keep Crowley up to date on the newest culture. (He didn’t have the heart to tell them that he was well aware of what was happening online, having been the inventor of some of it.) Then there was Anathema who leaves him on read.

The only other person who would be texting him at this time would be Gabe.

  
  


_ its just a nightmare gabe. everyone gets them once in a while _

  
  


Gabe let his phone fall flat onto his sternum. He didn’t even want to look at it right now. Mentally, he cursed human imagination. Because now that Crowley had placed that thought into his brain, he couldn’t be certain that it wasn’t just a bad dream.

Despite everything, he felt his eyes fight closing. They were strangely dry and begged for reprieve.

.-.. .. ..-. . .----. ... / .--- ..- ... - / .- / --. .- -- . / ..- -. - .. .-.. / - .... . / --. .- -- . / ... - --- .--. ... / -... . .. -. .----. / ..-. ..- -.

The snow had to stop eventually. When it did, it left a glistening buffer between the frozen solid ground and the dry air. It was crisp despite the rounded curves it laid in. Maybe not in the sense that it was sharp and pointy. It was crisp in that if you were to dunk your hand underneath the surface, the flakes would attack whatever skin you had revealed.

The air was crisp as well, but it was much more offensive. Invasive would probably be a better word for it. Where the thick snow was on the defence, only biting when provoked, the air was icy and sharp. It was on the offence, telling anyone that would even think about disturbing it’s peace to bugger off.

The Bentley did not naturally have a heating system. For the average antique car owner, this would not be surprising information. The difference between your average nearly a century old car, and this one, was who was taking care of it.

Crowley was cold-blooded. He’d had all the time in the world to curse his own shortcomings. This meant that the Bentley had somehow found itself with a self-heating system. No dials to turn or buttons to push, as it was always the perfect temperature for the season.

Gabe had to go back to the bookshop eventually. He’d said his goodbyes and thank yous to the two very generous last minute hosts before clambering into the inviting warmth.

Aziraphale was in the passenger seat and made Gabe sit in the back.

“How was your first sleepover?” the angel had a bemused twinkle in his eyes.

The former archangel’s brows knitted together. “What’s a sleepover?”

“It’s when someone stays the night at someone else’s house.”

“It was fine I suppose. Amy’s roommate had to take care of a batch of puppies last minute so I helped with that. We also began to watch a movie collection.”

Aziraphale made a noise in an attempt to respond but Crowley beat him to it. “Did you use protection?”

“I was unaware that I needed protection.”

This prompted the demon to snort and guffaw, and the angel to smack the demon on the arm, denying the giggles that escaped.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahaha so we can finally get a sense of a real plot forming in this mess of fluff and angst. as i said in the last note, looking for dog names as well. there was one particularly good idea put forth, but i'd like to give everyone a chance to put in their thoughts.
> 
> that blizzard? totally not a coincidence that bee was looking for him when it hit. they just weren't aware that they were the one to cause it


	16. Gabe Talks to Snakes (Well, A Snake) While He Leaves Aziraphale and Crowley To Worry

Gabriel’s thoughts continued to return to Beelzebub. Even after Crowley almost spun off of the ice coated road, Gabe found himself occupied with his own thoughts. 

Was it just a dream? Was the image of the Prince of Hell a simple creation of his underused imagination? The thought that he could create that kind of tortured scenario in his mind sent chills down his spine. The thing that really rattled his bones, however, was the fact that he wasn’t sure if it was a created image, or if it truly was a visit from Beelzebub.

As soon as the Bentley stopped outside of the bookshop, Gabe grabbed his guitar and rushed inside. The engine hadn’t even turned off when the bookshop door closed behind him.

The guitar was placed on top of his bed, to be properly put away later, and Pete found that he was roused from his slumber. Chilly hands supported his entire body but he recognized the scent to be that of the used-to-be-angel. In any other circumstances he’d bite the hand grasping him, even though he knew he produced no venom. It was usually enough to scare the assailant. 

The used-to-be-angel was nice though. Well, nicer than any other human he’d encountered so far. Life was rough to be a snake in central London, too many thrown grocery bags taught him that.

So as he was carried to the personal room of the used-to-be-angel, he curled around his arm. Pete felt the blood flowing through the arm he rested on and basked in it as it warmed up the body it was inside. Ah, to be warm blooded.

Aziraphale reached the top of the stairs just in time to see Gabe bring Pete with him into his room. He turned to the demon behind him.

“I’m worried about him, he was entirely too quiet to be normal.”

Crowley snorted. “You sure it wasn’t the fact I almost killed him?”

Aziraphale whispered, “You said that was an accident!”

“It was, I’m just kidding, angel.”

They were quiet as Aziraphale pottered around the kitchen, making a few cups of tea. He enjoyed doing it the human way, claiming it had something to do with the taste. Crowley, who had known the angel for longer than he’d known himself (well, his demon self. He saw Aziraphale in passing in Heaven when he went by Raphael,) recognized it as a coping mechanism. It was an endearing one, Crowley thought, the angel had never truly figured out what to do with his hands when stressed or anxious.

Sounds of Gabe talking to Pete rang through the almost silent flat.

“Angel…” Crowley slithered up to his love. “Give him some time. I’m sure he’ll come to us if he needs anything.” He placed his own cold hands inside Aziraphale’s warm ones. The angel let his head rest on the demon’s chest and listen to his heart (unnecessarily) beat.

“Oh, I do hope you’re right.” 

Crowley had no reply, he just put his lips in his angel’s hair. They stood like that for a good while, then broke apart as the water began to whistle.

.-.. .. ..-. . .----. ... / .--- ..- ... - / .- / --. .- -- . / ..- -. - .. .-.. / - .... . / --. .- -- . / ... - --- .--. ... / -... . .. -. .----. / ..-. ..- -.

“I just don’t know what to do.” Gabe flopped down on his now guitar-less bed. He cradled Pete in his arms, and laid him down on his chest. It was reminiscent of how he held the puppy from Amy’s house, but that was far from his mind.

Oh, this was curious, Pete thought to himself, the used-to-be-angel seemed to be having some sort of dilemma. It was not often that he was used as a sort of ‘ear’ to listen to other’s problems. That task was no longer his own, but the angel’s, who now is the one to listen to sometimes-snake-usually-human-shaped being and his problems.

“Why did I have that dream? I’ve never dreamed before, why was this the first one I had? What does it mean?”

If Pete could roll his eyes, he would. The used-to-be-angel worries too much. Must be something the angel taught him.

Gabe knew that Pete couldn't respond. But the snake is the only living being who would listen to him without worrying or making fun of him.

"If it was just a dream, that's fine. Great, even. But if it wasn't…" he trailed his fingers along the smooth scales. "I don't know what to do if it wasn't."

_ Tell the angel,  _ Pete hissed at him. Sadly, it seemed that Gabe did not understand what was said. It looks like the only being in the place that understood him was the sometimes-snake-usually-human-shaped being.

"I don't know how to fight a demon as a human," he shuffled his shoulders and sank further into the pile of pillows. "When I was an angel, it was smite and done. What do humans have? Exorcisms? Those rarely work and besides, Beelzebub uses their own form. What am I gonna cast them from?"

_ Talk to the angel, _ Pete repeated.

"It's not like I could even get close. They could overpower me easily now. I'm so weak, it's disgusting." Pete noted the tears forming in the used-to-be-angel's eyes. The snake didn't have tear ducts, but spent enough time around those that did to recognize it as a sign of distress.

Pete did the only thing he could do in this situation. He nuzzled his head into the used-to-be-angel's neck and up to his cheek.

Gabe let out a pained laugh. "Thanks. Not like you can understand me anyway, I lost that ability with my wings."

Pete found the statement uttered was incredibly incorrect.  _ It isn't up to you whether or not I understand you, it's up to you whether you understand me _ , he hissed into the used-to-be-angel's ear.

"I suppose, you probably want to go back to your home, huh?" Gabe stood and went to the door. 

Crowley looked up from his phone when a door opened. He saw Gabe cradling Pete in his arms shuffle to the habitat. 

"I'll take him," Crowley saw the opportunity to talk with Pete and learn what was bothering Gabe.

Aziraphale didn't believe that Crowley could communicate with snakes. Very few beings could talk with animals, most of them very high ranking. He knew Gabriel used to be able to, but the archangel lacked the curiosity it took to talk with lower beings.

Most demons lost their angelic powers when they fell. Crowley had always chalked his ability up to being the serpent of Eden. (Really, it was because he used to be Raphael, which he is actually really close to spilling the beans on.)

"What's up with him?" He whispered when the bedroom door closed once again.

_ Why don't you ask him? _

"Cheeky. What use are you if you can't even spy for me?"

Pete looked Crowley straight into his eyes.  _ Who else will listen to you whine when your angel does something dumb? _

"I do not whine!" Aziraphale looked up from his book. Crowley sent him a smile that was supposed to say 'don't worry angel, I'm completely and utterly sane!' but instead said 'look at me while I slowly lose my mind!' he lowered his voice. "Just answer the blessed question."

_ He is worried about a dream he had.  _ Pete left out the part about Gabe beginning to cry over his weakness, there was no need for the sometimes-snake-usually-human-shaped being to know that.

It all came crashing down.

.-.. .. ..-. . .----. ... / .--- ..- ... - / .- / --. .- -- . / ..- -. - .. .-.. / - .... . / --. .- -- . / ... - --- .--. ... / -... . .. -. .----. / ..-. ..- -.

Beelzebub listened to Gabe talk to Pete through the window. They used their fly form to avoid detection, hiding inside a lampshade to properly hear.

It wasn't their intention to plant doubt in the ex-Archangel's mind, meaning to make him scared was their goal. But this will do, they found. Let him unravel his own mind worrying about what's real and what's fake. Maybe they should visit him again tonight, actually talk with him.

Threaten his mortal soul.

Nothing hit the spot like a little bit of psychological torture, it looked especially good on paperwork. It requires so little resources but yields amazing results!

It was currently about noon, but already Beelzebub was excited to visit their plaything in his dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the late update! Life is getting busy and will probably remain so until mid to late February. Until then have a quick but important scene where I give Pete character traits and reveal a little more plot. Feedback always welcome!


	17. Oops Almost Forgot the Comfort Part in this Hurt/Comfort tag

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> note- there is some mild graphic injury description. it's the italics in the middle of the story, you can skip that section, just know that Gabe had a nightmare in that chunk of text

The owner of the lampshade Beelzebub hid in found that their shop had been stolen from. It was extremely unfortunate, all because they opened next to an antique bookshop that just so happened to house a demon, an angel, a former archangel, and their pet snake. 

Gabriel was reclined on a couch in the bookshop, which now had more places to relax than there were months earlier. He was getting back into reading about American culture. Meeting Amy had given him so much more information to work off of, and he was determined to know as much as possible. Which was a difficult feat, to say the least. 

He learned that America has 50 states, which is a chunk of land that is individual and different from the others. But those states all are part of a union that formed the United States of America. Those states have even smaller territories called “counties”, and within those are cities. Cities he was at least familiar with.

Sometimes, groups of states are similar enough to fall under a label to describe them. Most of them are vague, like the South, the East Coast, the Pacific Northwest, and many many other titles. But that girl from earlier, ‘book girl’ as Crowley keeps calling her, and Amy told him a little about growing up in America.

The Midwest, both Anathema and Amy had placed his accent in that area. Surely two very smart American women could not be wrong.

The title “Midwest” was very confusing. See, it is barely even west, though the mid part of it is right. Based on most maps he could find, the Midwest was in the middle of the continent, but more north.

He didn’t really care about the geography though. Well, he did, to an extent. Gabe wanted to know what the land looked like. London was a big city, and it was most of what he could base his Earth experiences off of. It was a shock to see just how big some states could get to be. And just how desolate, or densely forested, or flowered, the plains of the midwest could be.

Specifically, he looked up Minnesota. After many times spelling it ‘mini-soda’ in the search bar, he finally got what he wanted. Amy said she was from that state. Was it weird to want to know more about the state his friend grew up in? Gabe found he didn’t care, still blissfully unaware of social norms.

He learned that the state is one of the best, if not the best, when it comes to healthcare. It was the location of the first successful open heart surgery. He had to take a break after finding that out though, because he was unaware of what open heart surgery was. It turns out, google images is not the best place to go in order to learn about medical procedures. 

_ (“Angel, I think he’s squeamish around blood.” _

_ “Yes dear, that would seem to be the case.”) _

Minnesota also has a large ball of twine. For some reason. Reading into it, Gabe discovered that the ball of twine was almost 9 tons and made by one man. There was even a song written about it, he discovered on youtube, written by a certain ‘weird al’.

Scrolling through photos, he studied the landscape. It was truly beautiful, a work only God herself could have managed.

He fell asleep looking through photos. His phone slipped out of his hands and placed on the charger by an angel, while a demon with supernatural strength carried him into his bed.

_ Gabe heard laughing coming up behind him, he gripped the stick he was holding tighter in his hand. There was a dog running ahead on the ice, chasing a newly moving puck across the frozen lake.  _

_ Hockey was traditional in Amy's family, and if he wanted to be a part of that family, he'd have to learn. _

_ She hugged him from behind, resting her forehead on his shoulder. Even though it was visibly cold, with their breaths freezing in midair, he wished this moment would never end. _

_ It did end though, when Amy decided to play with their dog some more. She raced around Gabe, drilling lazy circles into the ice. Gabe was not as elegant despite the fact that he was once an angel. _

_ Amy tripped on her stick, sending her flying in front of Gabe's blades. _

_ He couldn't stop quick enough. _

_ A deep cut etched into her neck, severing her jugular for sure. He fell to his knees and cradled her in his arms. _

_ "Gabe-" Amy called, using what little air that was left in her lungs. Her arm reached out to his face, and held onto his cheek. Her hands were too cold. _

_ She couldn't stop coughing up blood. There was a deep wheeze in her limited breathing. _

_ Her arm fell to the ice, and all life vanished from her cold body. _

_ Hot tears froze to Gabe's face as lucidity vanished from his love's eyes. He vaguely noted that their dog was barking at him now, probably wondering why they weren't playing anymore. _

_ "No…" he whispered. "Please don't leave me. Please, I need you." He held her cheek in his hand, using his thumb to wipe away the single tear that slipped from her eye. _

_ "Don't leave me here." His voice broke, and he crumbled. He sobbed into the now lifeless body in his arms, the dog whined right next to him. _

_ In the warming house, Beelzebub was pleased with their work. _

Gabe jolted awake, a sob leaving his lips as soon as his eyes opened. He took a minute to ground himself, to breathe manually and remind himself that it was  _ just a dream _ .

His phone buzzed. He wondered distantly how he even managed to get into bed, or when he plugged his phone in. It didn’t really even matter, as he saw Amy’s name on the notification. 

  
  


_ hey, you up? _

  
  


Gabe smiled, and unlocked his phone.

  
  


_ Yeah, sadly I am. _

  
  


The night sky engulfed the city of London as snow fell slowly. The air was dry and frost settled on the windowsill. The cold concrete walls held the bitter wind outside and kept the warmth inside. Even the homeless on this night found they had a place to stay.

  
  


_ can i come over? i had a nightmare _

_ and can’t stand being in my home rn _

  
  


Gabe tumbled out of his room, Aziraphale and Crowley were sharing a bottle of wine.

“Can Amy come over?”

The two shared a look. “Of course, I’ll be sure she can find the shop.”

  
  


_ Yep, its the antique bookstore _

  
  


_ THAT’S where you live? Rumors  _

_ spread around town like wildfire about _

_ the owner, was he that dude with you _

_ at the store? the one with the tie? _

  
  


_ Yes, he’s gracious enough to let me _

_ live in the store _

  
  


_ okay, im on my way, be there in 15 _

  
  


Those following 15 minutes were the longest Gabe has felt in a long time. Soon enough, a pair of strong knuckles knocked on the front door.

When he opened the door, Amy was holding a puppy to her chest. 

“Hey, sorry about the dog. She wouldn’t leave me alone and would not stop barking until I took her with me.” She let out an anxious laugh. “This is the one from earlier anyway. She’s for you.”

Gabe took the dog in his arms. She was 6 weeks old by now. He could feel tears well up in his eyes. “Thank you, really.”

“What do you think you’re going to name her?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so so sososososososososososo sorry for the lateness! but now that my model un season is basically done i will finally have more free time to write


	18. Not an update

so i don't like how this is written, i feel like i got gabe's character entirely wrong. my story is lacking content and there is no real plot. i am NOT abandoning the concept, but consider this specific story to be done. i'll start a brand new fic and won't delete this one, no worries


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